Wowza: Food Fight Clean-Up In Wingnut Aisle 47
In what was dubbed a "grievance Olympics," "conference of clowns" and "Wrestlemania with Podcasters," the noxious mucky-mucks of MAGA assembled for the first time since Charlie Kirk's death at an ostensibly celebratory AmericaFest that swiftly cratered into a toxic mess of orcs hating on each other. Despite the blinding glitz, savage barbs flew: Anti-Semite! Islam whore! Epstein flack! A coward! A cancer! And nonsense-vomiting. One viewer: "Holy shit, America." The Nazi kids are not all right.
Last weekend's public, ugly, inevitable fracturing of a once-lockstep right for all to see came at Turning Point USA’s AmericaFest conference at Phoenix Convention Center. Billed as "a powerful celebration of faith, freedom, and the legacy of our founder" - though others called it "brownshirts in the desert" - it had Kirk plastered everywhere. Outside, banners urged "MAKE AMERICA CHARLIE KIRK"; inside, a huge portrait proclaimed, "WE ARE ALL CHARLIE KIRK"; nearby, weirdly, a Charlie Kirk murder re-enactment tent was set up for fans to take selfies in a spot just like where he was shot and killed. Wonkette: "Normal youth conference things!" About a third of the reported 30,000 in attendance, a "wretched hive of scum and villainy," were high school and college students who evidently have yet to find a life of non-malignant purpose.
Amidst the desperate, shrieking, best-is-yet-to-come! decor - omnipresent flashing red, white and blue, flashy pyrotechnics, gushing fountains, choking smoke bombs, glittering grifting widow in long blond locks and billowing gold and silver - the event quickly descended into a vicious gripefest where some of the world's most awful people - Carlson, Bannon, Don Jr., Megyn Kelly - furiously torched each other. Oddly, many focused their ire on a missing foil, podcaster Candace Owens, who'd been deemed too out there to even be invited for her lurid conspiracy theories about Kirk's death; she's charged it was choreographed by Israel and Turning Point bad actors, Egyptian airplanes have been following Erika Kirk for years, the public is being "gaslit," and police evidence to the contrary is "fake and gay." (LOL, sorta).
Leading off the squalid crack-up was Daily Wire's Ben Shapiro, who ripped pretty much everyone else as anti-Semitic "frauds," "grifters" and "charlatans" who have put the conservative movement "in serious danger." He called Steve Bannon "a PR flack for Jeffrey Epstein,” blasted Tucker Carlson's recent interview with "Hitler apologist, Nazi-loving, anti-American piece of refuse" Nick Fuentes - which over 7 million people watched - as an act of cowardice and "moral imbecility," and said Candace Owens "has been vomiting all sorts of hideous and conspiratorial nonsense into the public square for years."
Then Owens, online because unwelcome, called Shapiro "a miserable imp," whose remarks made her "more certain" that Israel was involved with Kirk's death.
Then Bannon trashed Shapiro for being "a cancer, and that cancer spreads. It metastasizes." Mocking Shapiro for trying to take over first Breitbart, now Turning Point, he snarled, "Stop playing patty-cake. Let's get down to it."
Then Carlson ripped Shapiro for being "pompous." Listening backstage, he said he laughed at Shapiro the way you would "when your dog starts doing your taxes." He also blasted former accomplices for "fake race wars" and "attacking millions of people because they're Muslims...It's disgusting. What the hell are you doing? You should not attack people." He added that calls to "de-platform" anyone at a Charlie Kirk event were "hilarious" when debate was (allegedly) "the whole point of Charlie's life."
Then Bosch Fawstin, creator of the anti-jihad cartoon superhero PIGMAN, assailed Tucker online: "Fresh from his most recent visit to his beloved Qatar, and after Muslims murdered Jews in Australia, Islam whore @TuckerCarlson yells at Americans to stop 'attacking Americans because they’re Muslim' to a silent crowd."
Then Rev. Jordan Wells castigated Shapiro, going full Nazi Kanye: “F**K YOU Ben Shapiro and the midget horse you rode in on. Ben IS the Synagogue of Satan...Jews aren’t chosen anymore."
Then Megyn Kelly slammed Shapiro (or maybe also Owens) with, "Only cowards take to the national stage to attack their 'friends' without so much as a phone call," like when the girl who was the head of our middle-school chorus told me she was going to take all my friends away...I helped make him a star."
In a rare, startling break from the rancorous fray, the equally startlingly brown Vivek Ramaswamy then decried all the raging racism, arguing the idea of a “heritage American” is ridiculous, and immigrants who just received citizenship are as American as anyone else: "We believe in ideals." The audience, silent and dubious, largely ignored him.
Then whew, Don Jr. clumsily lumbered back into the mud by arguing the "real enemy" wasn't any of these creeps but "the radical left that murdered Charlie," though of course they didn't. Ever cringey, he called up his dad, shouting out to “Mr. President,” so Trump could, ever abusive, praise Charlie and menace his idiot first-born: "I hope my son’s doing a good job representing me. Otherwise, I’ll have to say ‘You’re fired, Don.' So thank you very much."
Other odd ducks popped up to offer their malevolent insights. Laura Loomer stormed she would not support any candidate "who brings Tucker Qatarlson on the campaign trail. If you aren’t willing to publicly call Islam a death cult, I can’t vote for you." Russell Brand - what happened to him? - attacked vaccines and sorta commended Fuentes and Owens: "They’re Christians like you and me. They’re broken human beings like you and me." The few merciful in the crowd applauded.
Online, also (mostly) unwelcome, Nick Fuentes lambasted the sinking, "do-nothing" Trump, his latest bonkers speech, the Epstein files, the Reiner baseness, the relentless "SCAM": "He’s not delivering. All he’s doing is talking. Everyone hates this administration. The whole thing is a bait and switch. A never-ending advertisement...The magic is gone." Also largely gone, MTG echoed him, blasting Shapiro attacking Tucker and Bondi redacting Epstein: "People are raging and walking away."
Still, into the vitriolic mayhem, dreamily, spookily smiling, with God on her side and Charlie on her shoulder, wafted the gold-festooned widow Erika Kirk, aka "Princess Griftsalot." Between the group's assets, Charlie's estate, and sympathy donations, the former Liberty U "Christo mouthpiece" and Arizona beauty queen and glossy new head of Turning Point is now worth about $100 million dollars. After Charlie's death, media reports suggested she'd bring more young women into the MAGA fold - "Conservative women see the future" - but most still voted for Kamala, evidently unmoved by Kirk's call and perfect make-up to leave careers behind and "submit" to their husbands. But MAGA remains entranced. Onstage, Shapiro burbled that "to judge the goodness of a man is to see the goodness of his wife and children," and Erika is "unsurpassed."
But, like many of us, not great with tech issues. Gliding onstage in a glam gold lamé suit amidst erupting fireworks and wild applause, her hair looped in a blonde crown of thorns, she fumbled witeFesth her iPad, couldn't turn it on and wryly announced, "You know, the enemy has thrown a lot of curve balls at us, and now one of them is my entire speech has been wiped." (Antifa Hacks 'R Us!) After lamenting its lost "stats (and) things we have going on," she decided "we're just gonna wing it," awkwardly roamed the stage, and happily declared that, speech or no, "Charlie is sitting in one of those back seats." Later, she managed to laugh off both "the greatest Freudian slip of all time" - presenting a Charlie Kirk Courage Award to a student, she praised him for "persisting with the same grift" - and the flub of Nicki Minaj calling J.D. "an assassin. Trilled Erika, "God is good!"
Kirk notably ended her appearance by proclaiming, "We are going to get my husband’s friend JD Vance elected," though God knows why anyone would choose to lift up the racist, unprincipled "mutton-loaf," "professional embarrassment" and "greatest example in our nation’s history of ignorant, unqualified and incompetent people being rewarded for their pigmentation." Speaking of: Appearing late in HateFest, JD went from dog-whistle to bullhorn by proudly boasting of a new America where, "You don't have to apologize for being white (supremacist) anymore." The rabid crowd roared, grateful to be free - Thank God almighty we are free at last - of the longtime shackles of white oppression. Online, a gazillion people reported they'd never felt the need to apologize for being white, though some conceded JD may have been asked to apologize for being an awful human being.
Because he's evidently never heard of the First Amendment or George Washington's vow of a country that "gives to bigotry no sanction,” Vance also made the outrageous claim, "The only thing that has truly served as an anchor (of) America is that we have been, and by the grace of God always will be, a Christian nation." Adding to his Christofascism, he slammed progressive Senate candidates Graham Platner in Maine and Jasmine Crockett in Texas - "We're gonna kick their ass" - declined to condemn MAGA extremists as long as they "love America" - ie: Nazis welcome - touted the regime's deportation, vaccine and anti-trans atrocities, blamed "far left" Dems for Kirk's death (again, not) and, the next day, lashed out at both Nick Fuentes and Jen Psaki for "attacking" Usha, sneering, "They can eat shit. That's my official policy as vice-president of the United States." He sounds nice.
On Sunday, unholy Mike Johnson declared the vituperative event "a defining moment" and an "epic battle (to) determine the future of our great republic." He also said he's going to work to put up a Charlie Kirk statue in D.C., because that's really what America needs right now. This, then, is what came of the latest, meanest fascist food fight: A promised statue of a bigot, a consensus Nazis are OK by us, the lingering fumes of many feuds among execrable humans. And the mystifying drop of Erika Kirk's "worldwide exclusive" "Debut Music Video" - though she made one in 2012 where she maybe lied a bit - "and it is straight fire!" It is also deeply, incomprehensibly bizarre, an AI, badly dubbed, make-up-slathered, insensate non-look-alike dabbing her eyes with dollar bills and a fake handkerchief, pushing a wheelbarrow of money, coyly babbling, "Where's my spotlight? Buy my book. This mascara don't run. Give me privacy or I will cry. Boss babes always lie." Say what? This timeline is killin' us.
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