In a perfect finale to the long madness, Trump spent his last full day in office sulking, raving, issuing 45 pages of "racist nonsense," and signing a pointless executive order listing 244 weirdly random, deeply contradictory, historically inaccurate names - a statuary Night of 1000 Stars on steroids and Adderall - for his glorious, imaginary "Garden of American Heroes" to "reflect the awesome splendor of our country’s timeless exceptionalism.” He definitely should've bought Greenland.