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Thursday, September 21, 2017
Trump Says Frederick Douglass Is Doing An Amazing Job Making All His Friends Rich In Nambia
With death lurking daily - from un-health care or North Korea repaying our "deranged" leader by setting off a hydrogen bomb - we're thinking of moving to Nambia, which doesn't exist but didn't stop Trump from praising it to African leaders at the U.N., probably for its great covfefe. He also commended them for Africa's "tremendous business potential,” smirking, King-Leopold-like, “I have so many friends going to your countries trying to get rich!" What can we say? Pray for Nambia, and us.
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Wednesday, September 20, 2017
Tom Price Is Enhancing the Health of the American People By Wasting $60,000 On Private Jets, Trashing Medicaid and Committing Other Crimes Against Humanity
Hypocrisy, thy name is the malignant gang of grifters, liars and swamp monsters trying to rob Americans of their right to health care. Primary among them, Health and Human Services' Tom Price, who just spent $60,000 for private jets - look Ma, I'm ripping people off! - on several short trips he could have taken for as little as 50 bucks. This is a guy who rants about cutting waste, wants to slash Medicaid, opposes funding children's health and fighting AIDS. This is "a fantastic piece of shit."
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Tuesday, September 19, 2017
John Kelly Is All Of Us
That terrifying, bombastic, moronic, incoherent rant that was our Buffoon-In-Chief's speech to the U.N. elicited the horror and flood of Rocket Man jokes it so painfully deserved. It also prompted some memorable visuals in the often-stunned faces of his listeners - no more so than that of John Kelly, evidently lamenting some of his life choices.
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Monday, September 18, 2017
Whose Streets? The Police State's Streets
Once again, a judge has declared it's legal for cops to murder black people, even if cops scream beforehand they plan to, shoot to kill five times, and plant a gun on the victim to ensure they get away with it. The acquittal in St. Louis of Jason Stockley in the murder of Anthony Lamar Smith sparked days of protest; police have arrested and tear-gassed scores, appropriated the "Whose Streets?" chant, and boasted, "We're in control."
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Friday, September 15, 2017
We All Did It: The Birmingham Church Bombing
Friday marked the 54th anniversary of the Ku Klux Klan bombing of Birmingham's largest black church, which killed four black girls, and injured 19 more. Martin Luther King - who just three weeks earlier had delivered his "I Have A Dream Speech" - later noted the absence of white officials at the girls' funerals and declared, "More than children were buried that day; honor and decency were also interred."
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Thursday, September 14, 2017
National Security Head Issues Bold New Anti-Leak Plan, Which Quickly Leaks
Fed up with the "staggering" number of leaks from a fractured White House, National Security Adviser H.R. McMaster just issued a sweeping call for government-wide training to prevent unauthorized disclosure of both classified and some unclassified information that, he said, "causes harm to our Nation and shakes the confidence of the American people.” Some rogue staff evidently found him less than convincing: A few days later, Buzzfeed was sent the memo.
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Tuesday, September 12, 2017
A Good Look: NYPD Investigating Anti-Hate Vandalism of Murderous Colonizer As...Umm... Hate Crime
Irony Alert: After unknown perpetrators crept into New York's Central Park to give a statue of genocidal, native-enslaving, disease-spreading Christopher Columbus blood-red hands and a message reading, "Hate Will Not Be Tolerated," the NYPD announced they will investigate the act as a "hate crime." Some heretical New Yorkers, however, deemed it "a good look" for the explorer who sought to "ravage, kill, mangle and destroy" in the name of greed.
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Miss America Goes (Relatively) Rogue
So the Miss America Pageant - yes they still do that - had the usual crass empty glitter, but it also had some eye-popping, rabble-rousing, woke moments, like Miss Dakota decrying U.S. withdrawal from the Paris Climate Deal and Miss Texas slamming Charlottesville's "terrorist attack" by "white supremacists." Thus do we now live in a country where beauty queens are more principled and ballsy than....you know.
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Monday, September 11, 2017
The Hatred That Killed Them
Another 9/11 commemoration. Again, victims' families read out the solemn names, and wept for their own loved ones, and the cry rang out to "Never Forget." Yes. Let us never forget those lives lost - and that Iraq had nothing to do with it, the unholy war that followed was one of lies, its carnage and crimes still haunt and divide us, and its many thousands of brown-skinned victims - Twin Towers to Mosul - were just like those now under siege by the same kind of hatred.
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Saturday, September 9, 2017
Sing Me Back Home: RIP Don Williams
The great, tender, plain-spoken Don Williams, "gentle giant" of a Zen country music of grace and soul, has died at 78. Country? We know. But it's a grievous loss for those of us who once listened to him on 8-track in pick-ups gliding through the beatific woods. Williams' songs, said the Country Music Hall of Fame, were "a balm in troublesome times, (offering) calm, beauty, and a sense of wistful peace." May his voice endure, till the rivers all run dry.
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