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Homophobia Is Killing Our Youth
Today is a significant day for silence, youth, and our schools. Today, across the country schools will participate in a National Day of Silence to protest the homophobic bullying that is killing teenagers and honor those whose lives have been taken by the barbaric hands of hatred.
In less than two years there have been four brutal teenage deaths resulting from homophobic bullying. Just last week Carl Walker, an eleven year old in Springfield, Massachusetts , who never actually identified as gay, hung himself with an extension cord from the 3rd floor landing of his home. This was after his mother repeatedly implored his school to do something about the homophobic bullying he experienced. Last summer a transgendered teenager, Angie Zapata, was brutally murdered in Greeley, Colorado. Last February Eric Mohat, a 17-year old student from Ohio, who also never identified as gay, committed suicide after being repeatedly harassed with anti-gay epithets such as "fag" and "homo." His school went to trial last month as a lawsuit was filed by his parents, not because they want the school's money, but because they want to know why the school didn't respond to several requests for action. Also, last year, Lawrence King, a fifteen year old who identified as gay, was shot in the head twice in his English class. He died a few days later. His heart was donated the day after Valentine's day.
GLSEN (Gay, Lesbian, Straight, Education Network) and Harris Interactive recently conducted a study called "From Teasing to Torment: School Climate in America, A Survey of Students and Teachers." The study illustrates that 33% of teens report that students are frequently harassed because they are openly or are perceived to be lesbian, gay, or bisexual. It also shows that LGBT students are three times as likely to say that they do not feel safe at school and 90% of LGBT students state that they have been harassed or assaulted.
Watch these homophobic teenagers in action:
San Juan High School Gay Protest (Anti GLSEN) - The most popular videos are a click away
The FBI shows hate crimes based on sexual orientation to be the third most prevalent type. Regardless, George Bush vetoed the Matthew Shepard Act when it landed on his desk in 2007. This legislation would have protected people from hate crimes on the basis of perceived gender, sexual orientation, gender identity, or disability. Wyoming, the state where Matthew Shepard was tortured and left tied to a fence to die in 1998, along with 18 other states, still does not have legislation that prosecutes hate crimes towards LGBT people.
Change has been a pervasive concept in our country over the past two years. Barack Obama's presidential election, along with the dissolution of our economic institutions, are catalysts for significant change. We need to start applying this same principal of change to the institution of hatred entrenched in our culture. The Greek philosopher Aristotle, and social psychology pioneer Albert Bandura have both shown that aggression and hatred are learned behaviors. If a child is taught to hate and fear diversity, then the next place he or she expresses that hate is at school. Ten percent of all hate crimes occur at schools and colleges. If hate is learned, then it lies on the shoulders of our schools, church officials, parents, teachers, and communities to teach our young kids acceptance before they continue hurting each other, and before they become adults who will likely pass their hatred to the next generation.
Dissolving hatred in our society starts with each of us on an individual level. Whether we are straight, LGBT, black, white or all shades in between, if we want to heal hate among youth we must engage in a process of introspective exploration to reveal where we ourselves have held onto hatred, ignorance, fear, and anger. Amidst all this homophobic murder, and without dismissing accountability; even those of us who feel justified in our animosity towards those who hate, must forgive our judgments. Hate in any form is still hate and it contributes to its survival. In the story of the crucifixion (whether myth or fact) Jesus says himself, "Father forgive them, they know not what they do."
I believe a direct result of my own marginalization has been the choice I have made to look inward and heal patterns of my own judgment and fear of those who choose to hate. My experience as a gay man in this society has generated in me a depth of compassion and empathy. This facilitates my understanding that people who choose to hate in the name of "their" God are simply immersed in a human experience that is built on irrationality, fear, hatred and ego; but for them, truthful, nonetheless. I choose to remember that those who choose to attack are attacking an illusion they have crafted in their own minds. Even those who have died in the name of self-love and expression have not truly died, because love that has known itself as long as man has existed cannot be destroyed. I cannot say when, but I have faith that one day those who attack in the name of "their" god will discover that they are also attacking themselves.
When we heal the hatred and anger that lies in our own hearts and come to stand steadfast in our loving we become a beacon of light for the youth of our world. Youth who deserve to live long lives fully embraced, nurtured, and loved in the truth of who they are, regardless of seeming differences among sexual orientation, race, or gender.
On this day when our youth silently protest violent homophobia, and honor those whose have been murdered or committed suicide, I implore you to take a few silent moments to begin to ask the tough questions: "Where in my own life do I harbor hatred, fear, anger, and what steps can I take to begin to resolve it?"
- Posted in
43 Comments so far
Show AllI'd go up to that guy in the first video and smack him in the face with a dildo.
He might enjoy that too much.
I'd simply quite scripture back at him. There is much more in the new Testament about tolerance then there is about judging people. I once did this to a newly converted fundamentalist, and she called me the devil. I was proud of that moniker.
LOL While I share your sentiment, let's be smart about this (and nonviolent, if at all possible): that kid has been taught that God--the creator of the universe--hates homosexuals. Dildo-smacking aside, the root issue is the interpretation of the Bible that kid has been exposed to, and the obvious fear he's learned.
Well, I'm Jewish, and not particularly religious, so that would be a debate I couldn't do. I sure could smack him around for his bigotry though.
Where were all of those natural-born homosexuals 50 years ago? As I recall, we knew there were a few around but it was no great problem as they were not attempting to push their way of life on society. Just like the tea-baggers, when someone starts some stupid demonstration, plenty of people will join in to feel they belong to something, Maybe our young folks need something productive to keep them busy with.
Compelling remarks, dude!
"Push their way of life on society"? What is that supposed to mean? There is "them" and then there is "society"? Them's not part of society, I suppose.
And I suppose he and the christians and conservatives going all out to eradicate gay's and lesbian's right to life, liberty and the persuit of happiness aren't pushing their way of life on society!
Uh, no, they were denying their nature by attempting to live the accepted version at that time of a normal life...then now, in their middle and old age, they reveal their homosexuality, after being forced to repress it for so long.
Where were they? They were in fear of being harassed, and beaten. Losing their jobs. Jailed. Even killed. Even TODAY, in a supposedly civilised society, GLBTs still get beaten, still get killed.
"push their way of life on society. "
Right. Because you are being forced to go gay.
If you are going to be homophobic, at least come up with arguments that aren't so pathetically sophomoric. At least put some effort into your trolling.
You are just stupid, Kernelz.
You're a more tolerant man that I, George.
I don't think my capacity for charity is large enough to have left out "mean-spirited", "myopic", and "self-centered".
I admire your judicious restraint.
· Yr Obd't Servant
"Where were all of those natural-born homosexuals 50 years ago? As I recall, we knew there were a few around but it was no great problem as they were not attempting to push their way of life on society. Just like the tea-baggers, when someone starts some stupid demonstration, plenty of people will join in to feel they belong to something, Maybe our young folks need something productive to keep them busy with"
They were there. And they have ALWAYS been there. And they have been hiding, living lives of desperation because they knew that if they showed anyone who they were, they could be beaten, harassed, of killed.
I knew several gays when I was in college back in the mid 70's, and when each of them let it be known, damn near all of them got the shit kicked out of them. Would YOU let someone know about YOUR inner self if it meant that they would turn on you, beat you up and tell others to do the same?
They were there, but they kept it from you. Chances are good that you knew a few yourself, but they didn't feel good enough about YOU to let you know. And with the attitude you show, I don't really blame them.
Goodness, that first video says it all! Our lovely Christians always ready to hate and worse. It's a deeply troubling state of affairs.
Regarding hatred, violence, and murderousness, see also today's article "Denormalizing the Signs of Impending Disaster" by Michael Schwalbe.
Yet this country that has got such severe problems (already 60 people murdered this year in multiple killings!) still insists on being the world's leader (a song Obama loves to sing; leader in what, Mr. President?) and on instructing other nations in the niceties of proper conduct.
Yes, it says it all. Ever notice that hate groups are always whining about being harassed? That was a favorite trick of the Nazis, I believe.
From homophobia, there comes a lot of unwanted symptoms such as societal/cultural intolerance of what one can wear. I'm already well aware of the sad fact that in the West, men have fewer options of dressing while women can dress up as they please and even wear men's clothing and not be called lesbian for doing so. If a guy appears to be even partially dressed like a woman, he's called gay despite the fact that he is not. In general, if a woman cross-dresses, no problem but if a guy is even looked at as cross-dressing, then he's suddenly labeled as a gay. The other day at work, a guy was harassed just because he was caught wearing tights under his pants when he took off his shoes quickly to clear an impediment that was bothering his feet. He wasn't even showing them off. He tried to not let it be noticed but as soon as a couple of ladies noticed, they jumped on him and called him gay and raised hell on him as did a few other coworkers shortly after. I couldn't stand the commotion and jumped in and even defended his wearing pantyhose. He told that he wore them not because he was gay which he wasn't but because of health and comfort reasons.
On an interesting note, Steve Newman (http://www.nylongene.com) correctly proves on his blog that all this homophobia that has been ongoing has spread to limiting men's fashion choices. Men used to be able to wear tights and look skinny and more handsome unlike all the baggy-pants versions I've come across more often than not. If I see a guy wearing tights under his shorts, I don't see him as gay but in fact more masculine looking. If a woman wears the same tights under her shorts, she looks more feminine. Sometimes, I think that giving men equal fashion rights as women would actually reduce the homophobia big time. Besides, homophobia wasn't significant up until the 20th century.
P.S.: Steve Newman is generally conservative and yet he has a tolerant view that tights is just another clothing that is not restricted to one gender or the other. In fact, of the men who do wear tights, he points out that most of them are straight men often mistaken as gay though that's starting to change. Besides, when guys can wear pink shirts to work, I see nothing wrong with them wearing shorts and tights to work either. I'll admit that I'd be tickled to see them dressed like that since they'd look cute and masculine. :)
It's no one's business what a a man or woman wears under their pants or skirts. Did that man press harassment charges against them? Besides, women are wearing tights and pantyhose less often anyways since more businesses are getting lenient on women going barelegged to work. However, this does not mean that men should be forbidden from wearing tights and pantyhose even for health and comfort purposes. More athletic men wear tights nowadays as do athletic women. I can guarantee you that if anyone approaches a male athlete in tights and calls him gay, the response won't be pretty.
I saw the website you posted by the way and I even saw you posting the event you described under one of Steve's blog posts. I have to agree with Steve that men will have to be less afraid to dress as they wish. If they want to do it for health and comfort reasons especially, they need to be bold on their own. I don't think that you or the man's wife trying to defend the man wearing pantyhose under his legs is going to help alone. He needs to develop his own inner strength and courage in the end. By the way, I saw picture of you when I clicked your name there and I must say that you look lovely. :)
With regards to men wearing what they want though, I don't think that I can envision my grandsons going to school with even a kilt on let alone a skirt. The other day you mentioned boots for men and even the ankle boots. Let's say that a high school senior gets himself a pair of male tights, men's boots, and kilts on. Perhaps he would look manly to some because of his overall appearance. Unfortunately, he'll still be mistaken as a gay by many even if he isn't. Maybe that will change. I find it interesting that Steve Newman would say that he's never encounter a gay individual wearing pantyhose whereas all the men he's encountered wearing pantyhose are straight men and some even married.
"It's no one's business what a a man or woman wears under their pants or skirts. Did that man press harassment charges against them?"
No, he didn't and I too was surprised.
"More athletic men wear tights nowadays as do athletic women. I can guarantee you that if anyone approaches a male athlete in tights and calls him gay, the response won't be pretty."
I do see them a lot myself as I go to and from my office building to my parking lot a couple of blocks down the street. They don't look feminine at all in them. Usually the male athletic tights are more spandex than nylon. If I lived a mile or two from work, I'd be doing the same instead of driving a long ways.
"I have to agree with Steve that men will have to be less afraid to dress as they wish. If they want to do it for health and comfort reasons especially, they need to be bold on their own."
Yeah, that's true. The guy I defended the other day let his wife come to work the next day to speak her mind out and even stood by his side. Unfortunately, once she left, the coworkers kept laughing behind his back and cracking more jokes about him even to the point of suggesting that he and his wife change sexes ! All this homophobia crap has got to stop.
"Let's say that a high school senior gets himself a pair of male tights, men's boots, and kilts on. Perhaps he would look manly to some because of his overall appearance. Unfortunately, he'll still be mistaken as a gay by many even if he isn't. Maybe that will change."
Well, like you said, it'll only change when more men aren't afraid to dress as they wish. Still, societal and cultural tolerance must first come about. It's all this fashion glitz in the media that's dividing people on who can wear what. For example, I may not feel comfortable wearing tight jeans but I'm not going to stop someone else from doing so.
"By the way, I saw picture of you when I clicked your name there and I must say that you look lovely. :)"
Oh thanks. Actually, that picture was taken a couple of years ago and I need to really get my pictures updated. I have longer hair and it's somewhat thicker. My legs are not quite as fat as the picture makes it look like. Also, I don't go to work dressed like that. I may wear shorts with tights to work now and then but not really that short. I generally don't wear miniskirts either unless I'm behind my laundry schedule but as with shorts, I have to wear tights under it which I don't mind at all since I don't feel comfortable going barelegged anyway. I generally wear long skirts and pants though. Wearing tights under my pants or skirt does add a lot of comfort. :)
I hope your coworker sues the hell out of those people, the manager, the company, etc. That's pretty fucked up.
I strongly agree. He needs to have the courage to do that in addition to wearing what he wants under his pants. He's a bit too shy while his wife isn't. Steve Newman of nylongene.com told me this of that man,
"I'm guessing that having his wife come over and scold them for picking on him is probably NOT going to be the fastest route to gaining their respect. I'm afraid that your friend needs to learn to stand up for himself, or he will never earn that."
I hope God puts some stability into our society. I have a bad feeling that our upcoming Great Depression is going to produce more cultural instability unlike the 1930s one which actually brought everyone together.
For guys, not being allowed to wear shorts to work really isn't a matter of sexual identity or gender expression.
It is a matter of bare hairy legs in shorts looking really unprofessional in most workplaces. It is the same reason why a man cannot wear a singlet to work.
Re the baggy pants, if you get way with shorts at work, you are likely to see MORE people wear baggy pants, not less. The baggy pants have become much more common because men spend much more time nowadays dressed informally, in whatever clothes casual clothes they find comfortable. How many men nowadays wear a suit unless they are forced to so? Compared to baggy jeans and t-shirt? How much money do men nowadays spend on suits and dress shirts vs jeans and t-shirts compared to in the past?
"It is a matter of bare hairy legs in shorts looking really unprofessional in most workplaces. It is the same reason why a man cannot wear a singlet to work."
The same could be said of women. Nobody can stop a guy from grooming his legs if he chooses to do so. In fact, for the guys that wear tights, most of them would likely groom their legs first.
"Re the baggy pants, if you get way with shorts at work, you are likely to see MORE people wear baggy pants, not less. The baggy pants have become much more common because men spend much more time nowadays dressed informally, in whatever clothes casual clothes they find comfortable. How many men nowadays wear a suit unless they are forced to so? Compared to baggy jeans and t-shirt? How much money do men nowadays spend on suits and dress shirts vs jeans and t-shirts compared to in the past?"
That is true although I didn't know that if men could get away with wearing shorts, then there'd be more guys in baggy pants. I'm guessing this has to do with the obesity epidemic that has ruined us all.
I'll be sure to pass on your comments to the UPS guys.
Did you see the part where I said "most workplaces"? ;)
Physical jobs that involve working in the open, possibly in hot / humid / wet weather are clearly not what I meant.
I never wear shorts..my legs are so thick and strong that no matter the length of the shorts, they always ride up to my thighs when I sit down...even baggy brand-name jean shorts. I always just wear jeans.
It's great that his issue is getting attention. Congratulations to all the brave high school and middle school kids who participated in the day of silence, who have the courage to be out in their schools and try to change the homophobia there.
It's disturbing to me that any article about gay rights published on commondreams draws homophobic comments, like that posted here by "kernelz." Of all the different issues commondreams publishes about, why is it gay and lesbian rights that always gets these sort of extreme right-wing responses, whereas other issues seem to draw postings from people who value peace, human rights, and so on? I'm really asking - I'd love to hear some discussion about this, if folks have insights to share.
An interesting question. I'm not sure that there is a simple, or even any, real answer though.
Even among the GLBT community, there are gays who ridicule everyone else, lesbians who dislike gays and who consider transgendered women, that is those who weren't born female, as just men playing at being women. Etc.
Just goes to show they're human like the rest of us.
Back in my younger days out here in the Magnolia, there were quite a lot of he-man-woman-hating clubs just as there were racist clubs. After trying to overcome the gender divisions, my grandchildren nowadays have to watch out for being mistaken as same-sex lest they get stoned. Maybe that's why the teen pregnancies keep going up. There's gotta be a limit on all this intolerance crap. Be what you want to be but don't go attacking someone else for not conforming.
Sadly, there's no limit. There can be progress, just not here or in Muslim countries.
The young homophobe in the first video would do well to return to class and learn a few things before he continues to flap his gums. But that is not what a young republican leader will do, LEARN. He already has a very closed mind, mores the pity. But no doubt he will be the leader of the republican party in years to come, and then will be caught picking up strangers in a men's room airport somewhere.
Someone needs to ask him what CHRIST said about homosexuality, not what Paul said about it. There are many who think that Paul himself WAS gay. Kind of like Jesse Helms and Larry Craig. Christ himself said NOTHING about it. He didn't think it was important enough to discriminate and hate people over. In fact, Christ's message was to LOVE those who you have issue with. LOVE thine enemies. He didn't say love only those who you agree with.
It really amazes me that those who call themselves "Christians" can ignore the very words of he that they claim to follow whenever it suits their hatred. Christ said that he put an end to the old ways, and that includes the old testament, other than the ten commandments (and even those can be boiled down to 2 like George Carlin points out). And yet here this kid is quoting the old testament like it should be followed because he is a "Christian". If that is so, has this kid ever eaten shellfish? Then he should be put to death. Eaten pig? Same thing. Does he wear mixed cloth clothing? Death to him. Has he ever spoken back to his parents? Stone him to death.
And what does this kid even understand about the "perversions" he talks about? He has NO idea what perversions are out there waiting for him. If he thinks that THIS is a reason for hatred, and he obviously does, then just wait until he grows up a little bit and sees what is REALLY out there.
I feel sorry for this kid, I really do. His mind and heart are closed at such an early age. What a shame that he thinks so much of his own intellect that he is willing to stop learning at such an early time in his life. Just what we need, more kids who hate for no reason and demand that their hatred be honored like it's a decent thing to do.
I work with a bunch of grown men who do nothing but call each other "fag" and "homo" and talk about sexually humiliating each other. When called on it, they think I need to "lighten up."
It's amazing how the most homophobic men want to essentially force other men to perform sex acts on them.
Jennifer Bedingfield makes a good point about men's clothes. Guys aren't allowed to wear jeans that actually fit anymore. Not that relaxed fit pants aren't more comfortable. That's what I've been wearing for a while. Freedom of movement. :) But it's as if a lot of men look for reasons to crap on other men.
Insecurity plays a huge role. Men are often pressured into proving their manhood in whatever way. And often that sense of masculinity is distorted via popular culture or the lack of a real male role model. You'd be surprised at how many of these guys barely knew their fathers if at all.
I dunno Kernelz. I think gays just want to be left alone and treated with dignity. I doubt that anyone is trying to force homosexuality on anyone. How can it be done? I knew I liked girls when I was 5. I would imagine that most homosexuals knew what they were early in life also.
Who would choose it considering the discrimination and intolerance they would face as a result?
"Insecurity plays a huge role. Men are often pressured into proving their manhood in whatever way. And often that sense of masculinity is distorted via popular culture or the lack of a real male role model. You'd be surprised at how many of these guys barely knew their fathers if at all."
On the issue of insecurity, I don't think it's just men pressuring men but even a lot of women pressuring men. I've come across quite a few army wives who would brag about their husbands serving and ask them about their take on their husbands choosing to withdraw because there's something they find that they don't like about the war and I'll get hostile responses such as "Well, if he does that I'm gonna divorce him", "He's not a man if he's going to withdraw", "Only gay men in the military would withdraw !", "If he does that, I'll make him undergo a sex change !", or even "If my husband withdraws, I'm gonna raise a living hell on him and make him wish he were never born." Most army wives are usually not that nasty but will often make it look like he's serving "honorably" even though he's doing a pol's dirty work in reality.
Speaking of guys barely knowing their fathers at all, when I brought up the fact that men used to wear skintight clothing on the legs during the middle ages, I would get all sorts of wacky responses and some even saying "Yeah, well they were gay back then but don't tolerate all that !" but that was 10 years ago and I was living in the conservative small towns. I'm thinking that some of this has changed in the inner cities and even some of the suburbs though that has a long ways to go.
The manhood craziness has gotten way out of control that it has infected womanhood as well and even promoted more aggressiveness within the female realm which may explain why nobody complains when a woman dresses like a man even to the point of wearing a tie. Don't get me wrong, I don't want men to lose their manhood or women to lose their womanhood but something needs to be worked out.
"The manhood craziness has gotten way out of control that it has infected womanhood as well and even promoted more aggressiveness within the female realm which may explain why nobody complains when a woman dresses like a man even to the point of wearing a tie."
As a guy who likes to dress up, in dress shirt / pants, suit etc, but absolutely hates wearing ties, I say that women are welcome to the ties. ;)
Ties are evillll. Thank G-d my workplace is so casual, I wear a t-shirt and jeans to work every day.
There isn't anything new about this. As an Indian American though I was born and raised in the USA, I've sometimes gone through annoying hell in middle school, high school, and even college trying to prevent others from bugging me about whether or not I like girls. Now that I read this article, I have a feeling that back in my school days in the early 1990s, there was already a lot of homophobia. If I had said that I didn't like girls, I would have been labeled as a gay guy. If I had said that I like girls, I would have been made fun of at for not having had a girlfriend. I also risked getting setup and framed for rape and murder as had been the case to another Indian American friend of mine. As a result, I often tried not to answer the question. Unfortunately, I got hated at simply because I wanted to learn and get through school peacefully. I was even twice shot at and nearly mugged to death. Every time I keep hearing Americans trashing us hard working Indians, I often like to shout back at them and tell them that maybe if people would quit picking on others and actually grow up and learn to respect one another's beliefs, the jobs wouldn't be going overseas !
That's pretty bad. I went through being left out myself when I was in school but that was just because I was fat when I was a kid. Yeah, kids can discriminate against those of us kids who just want to study and get through school.
"Every time I keep hearing Americans trashing us hard working Indians, I often like to shout back at them and tell them that maybe if people would quit picking on others and actually grow up and learn to respect one another's beliefs, the jobs wouldn't be going overseas !"
On the issue of outsourcing, it's not about how smart you are. It's about who the companies can hire for the cheapest labor rates possible. My parents told me that back in the 1960s, all you needed was a high school degree and you would get a well-paying job. Today, you need a bachelor's degree at minimum and they still ask for job experience even in most entry level jobs and yet on those same jobs overseas, they'll most likely go easy on those foreigners only because the company can pay them far less even below the minimum wage and get away with it.
And don't forget that many countries, India among them, have better education systems than the US.
I cannot deny that truth. Still, I hear that outsourcing to them hasn't helped much and that there are more local businesses getting back on track back in India. The USA could sure learn to do more of that for a change.
"I often like to shout back at them and tell them that maybe if people would quit picking on others and actually grow up and learn to respect one another's beliefs, the jobs wouldn't be going overseas !"
And in maybe 20 years, or even 10, as India developes further, what are you going to shout when the jobs move from India to some other country?
The only point in outsourcing jobs is to get the lowest labour cost possible as Jennifer points out. It is similar to why for example, software companies choose to develope on Microsoft platform, instead of unix / linux / solaris. Because programmers who can program on a Microsoft platform for a very low cost abound all over the world.
Anyone notice the Helmeted Apparition, right hand skyward in Tuetonic Salute on the wall above the Little Fascist in the first video?
Other than making a case for Eugenics, Little Fascists serve one useful purpose-It's fun to dress them in pink tights, give them $20.00 and drop them in the Tenderloin for 8 hours.
If you can drag them kicking and screaming away from Sodom, they just ruuuun right back!
Funny, cause when littlefascists do come crawling, begging and wanting some from a real Gay man, Gays look down on, laught at, and have NO use for them! None! Ahhh the irony.
USBLUES
It seems to me that anti-gay attitudes are much worse than they were when I was in grade school in the late 70s/early 80s. And I know Americans are much, much more anti-gay at this point than the British. The Brits have actually implemented anti-bullying legislation and have made good-faith efforts to reduce it in schools. Here in the US, I've heard school administrators tell kids that are being bullied that they'll just have to get used to it because that's just part of life. I attribute a lot of the worsening of anti-gay attitudes to the rise of right-wing hate TV and radio in the late 80s and 90s and to the increasing dominance of right-wing fundamentalist religion in the US. I never thought 30 years ago that using "gay" as a general putdown would become common even among adults, nor that norms of gender appearance would get even narrower than they were in the 70s and 80s. We have really regressed in this area, regardless of how many gay celebrities there are ... and there are a lot more openly gay (and effeminate) male celebrities in Britain than in the US, where it seems to be more acceptable for women celebrities to be openly gay than for men.
I'm not sure I agree.
IMO, you are making a similar mistake to kernelz. Note, I'm not saying that you are homophobic or anything like that. Bullying seems worse nowadays because more and more GLBT are no longer hiding. Getting severely beaten is much worse than getting bullied.
The thing you need to keep in mind is that GLBTs today have far more rights, not equal rights no, but far more rights than they did in the 70s and 80s.
You can be actually openly GLBT nowadays, and be less likely to be fired from a job, or not get a job at all. The GLBT celebs are an illustration of this. There are even national presidential candidates who are willing to go on the record stating there they favour completely equal rights for GLBT people, Bill Richardson for one. Granted neither of the 2 final candidates, Obama and McCain, favour(ed) completely equal rights.
The thing that people need to keep in mind is that many many polls show that the young are far more tolerant of GLBT people than their parents and grandparents. The prop 8 vote in California was a case in point. The vote pretty much broke down around generational lines, with voters 30 and below overwhelmingly in favour of the right of GLBTs to marry, and opposition to the right to marry increasing as the age groups increased.
And the homophobes know this. The homophobes are definitely aware that over time, they are losing the argument. What the GLBT community lacks in numbers, in power, it has made up with patience and refusal to give up and submit over years and decades.
That is why the responses of the homophobes is getting ever more virulent and desperate. Because they know that they are losing the argument.