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Seeking to rally the troops for his unholy war, Christian nationalist, TV-carnie and war fanboy Pete Kegseth just passed off some vengeful Gospel According to Tarantino as scripture at his (unconstitutional) Pentagon prayer service, and yes we have them now. Added to the "shameless blasphemy" of quoting - without credit - Samuel Jackson's homicidal hitman Jules as "prayer," Pete moronically misses the redemptive point: As he cites the "tyranny of evil men," he, unlike Jules, doesn't friggin' get that he is one.

With their calamitous illegal war continuing to spiral out of control, flailing regime officials are striking out in ever more erratic ways. Nursing his deranged feud with Pope Leo XIV, a vindictive Private Bonespurs - Suffer the little children to own the Pope - abruptly cancelled an $11 million contract with Catholic Charities in Miami to fund a vital, decades-long foster program for migrant children, aka small deadly illegals, who enter the U.S. alone. The result of "an incredibly psychologically harmful" move for already vulnerable kids: "They don't know who or where they are from day to day." Meanwhile, slimy, Bible-and-chest thumping braggadocio Pete is working hard to inflict his own fire-and-brimstone carnage.

Blithely pressing on with a serial slaughter based on evidently "entirely make-believe" grounds, Hegseth killed three more "narco-terrorists," likely fishermen, in the Eastern Pacific last week. It was the third boat bombing in three days - complete with giddy video - in the name of a "narco-trafficking" criminal conspiracy of which, experts say, there is "zero evidence"; they also say the murders have "no impact at all" on America's drug problems. Despite bogus legal theories scrounged up by the regime in an attempt to justify the deaths of at least 177 mostly innocent people, rights advocates note, “'Murder' is the general term for premeditated killings outside of armed conflict."

In the wake of those transgressions and many more, Democrats just filed six articles of impeachment against Hegseth; their lead sponsor, Iranian-American Arizona Rep. Yassamin Ansari, cited "high crimes and misdemeanors,” including war crimes, abuse of power, and other charges. The bill didn't mention Hegseth's clearly unconstitutional worship services (what separation of church and state?), part of a brazen Christian crusade that faces a lawsuit arguing, "The federal government’s role is to serve the public, not proselytize." Nor does it flag his bloody, unseemly prayers for U.S. troops to inflict “overwhelming violence against those who deserve no mercy."

The impeachment effort also fails to target the movie plagiarism and general dumbfuckery committed by cosplay Hegseth, one of a host of inept imposters in this awful Oceans 11 re-make, in his latest, lamest piece of performance art: Asking Pentagon officials and their families at last week's "Christian" service to bow their heads in prayer for a godless war as he recited scripture from the Book of Ezekiel, or maybe "Caesar" or Samuel or Snakes On A Plane, a prayer he claimed was delivered by the lead planner of the “Combat Search And Rescue” mission that earlier this month rescued two pilots downed in Iran."They call it 'CSAR 25:17,' which I think is meant to reflect Ezekiel 25:17," he blustered of "the Lord’s word about who we are and how we conduct ourselves...Pray with me please."

With his greasy smirk, he then launched into an almost word-for-word rip-off of the iconic speech by blood-stained hitman and aspiring philosopher Jules Winnfield, played indelibly by Samuel Jackson in Quentin Tarantino's 1994 black comic morality tale Pulp Fiction. Moments later, Jules point-blank executes hapless young Brett, not because he posed any threat or was allegedly developing nuclear weapons, but because Jules is just following orders. Because that's his job. Because each time he kills a stranger in cold blood, he likes to first recite that "prayer," which propitiously helps make him feel powerful, morally upright, cleansed of whatever guilt or grief or questions that might otherwise trouble his sleep.

"The path of the downed aviator is beset on all sides by the iniquities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men," Pete declaimed. "Blessed is he who, in the name of camaraderie and duty, shepherds the lost through the valley of darkness, for he is truly his brother’s keeper, and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to capture and destroy my brother. And you will know my call sign is Sandy One when I lay my vengeance upon thee, and Amen." Some in the audience, presumably moviegoers, chuckled at the source; others looked dutifully, cluelessly solemn as their kids squirmed in boredom. Blessed be the hitmen. Let us prey, indeed.

In reality, of the three passages in Ezekiel 25:17, only the shortest comes close to Pete's/Jules' harangue: "I will execute great vengeance on them with furious rebukes, and they shall know that I am the LORD when I lay My vengeance upon them." Tarantino, a fan of Kung Fu flicks, lifted his own fake version from a 1973 Japanese martial arts film, Karate Kiba, about a Kung Fu vigilante who vows to eliminate the crime-infested drug business in Japan. Hegseth, the guy with Nazi tattoos who lectures people about "Christian values," didn't mention or credit Tarantino, a theft and sacrilege first caught by Baptist minister Brian Kaylor. But no harm no foul: In today's idiocracy, notes Mary Trump, "Who among us has not mistaken the holy words of Tarantino's Pulp Fiction for Biblical scriptures?"

Online, Pentagon shill Sean Parnell acknowledged the prayer was "obviously inspired by dialogue in Pulp Fiction"; of Pete's failure to note that, he argued, "Anyone saying the Secretary misquoted Ezekiel 25:17 is peddling fake news and ignorant of reality." The next day, at a briefing on the war, the thin-skinned Hegseth again went off and Biblical on the press, calling their accurate reports on an unpopular war "unpatriotic" and likening the media to the Pharisees: "They were there to witness (but) their hearts were hardened (in) pursuit of their agenda." The whining didn't go over well; America really seems to hate Pete. "The gospel according to St. Jack Daniels. What a dick," they griped, and, "Talibangicals' perverted take on Christianity - Hegseth is literally an anti-Christ. And a rapist."

Mostly, people were pissed at his ignorant appropriation of the much-loved Pulp Fiction for his own base and bloody purposes, declaring, "And you call yourself a white Christian nationalist?" and, "I'd take Samuel Jackson's character over Pete's any day." They wondered if, next time, Pete would add the famed Biblical parable, "You know what they call a quarter-pounder with cheese in Paris?” (Royale.) They argued Pete's "scriptures" should include more "Motherfucker"'s, they offered hilarious video of Jules meeting up with another quivering Brett, they marveled at the idiocy of Hegseth, a bellicose grandstander who didn't understand that, in Jules' bonkers, vengeful "prayer," the speaker is actually the bad guy.

In one of Pulp Fiction's two final scenes, in the diner where the film begins, Jules comes to a belated moral reckoning with himself. He has long justified his bloody past by telling himself (like Pete) he's taking righteous vengeance on the "bad." But earlier that day, after killing Brett, he's "miraculously" untouched by a barrage of gunshots - a survival he attributes to "divine intervention, a sign to re-evaluate his life. Of his ritual recitation, he tells the young thief, “I never gave much thought to what it meant...It was just some cold-blooded shit to say to a motherfucker before I popped a cap in his ass...The truth is, you’re the weak, and I’m the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo, I'm tryin' real hard to be the shepherd." Drunken, unctuous, preening Pete, who keeps missing the point, should too.

"Woe to those who manipulate religion and the very name of God for their own military, economic, and political gain, dragging that which is sacred into darkness and filth - Pope Leo X1V