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Petrolify will change your life--and life on Earth--in ways you may have once thought impossible. Just be sure to read the warning label. (Image: Post Carbon Institute)

Introducing Petrolify®: The Power of Petroleum in One Little Pill

Asher Miller

Imagine there was a pill you could take every day that would provide you with wealth, freedom, and luxuries beyond the imagination of even the wealthiest kings of yesteryear. Taking this pill would give you the equivalent of hundreds of slaves, working for you 24/7, to grow your food, cool and heat your home, entertain you, carry you however far you wanted to travel, fill your bath with hot water, you name it… That’d be amazing!

Well, guess what? You’re already taking it. And it’s called Petrolify®.

You’re ingesting Petrolify® with nearly every breath and every footstep you take. Most of us don’t realize that Petrolify® is being pumped into our water and injected into our food. But we reap its magical benefits regardless. Did you sleep indoors last night? You can thank Petrolify®. Did you eat breakfast today? Again, that was thanks to Petrolify®. Are you reading this message on your mobile phone or computer? The miracle of Petrolify® never ends!

Except that miracle comes with some deadly side effects, and an expiration date.

That is why we created the above parody commercial, to remind as many people as possible that the dream we’re living—a dream fueled by a one-time, finite fossil fuel bonanza—is far darker than they might suspect.

When we open our eyes to the hidden costs of Petrolify®, it’s easy to blame the ‘corporate bad guys’—the manufacturers, the drug reps, the doctors—who are pushing their product on an unwilling populace. But we’re not quite so unwilling, are we? No, we want what they’re selling. And, there is no “they”. They are us.

Thankfully, our wellbeing doesn’t have to depend on Petrolify®. We can choose for our energy needs to be met with renewable, and more ecological and socially just, sources. More important, we can learn to live well with less. Conservation doesn’t have to be the “c” word.

The first step is recognizing our pill-popping addiction for what it is. Please help spread the word that Petrolify® may not be right for us.


Our work is licensed under Creative Commons (CC BY-NC-ND 3.0). Feel free to republish and share widely.

Asher Miller

Asher Miller is the executive director of the Post Carbon Institute.

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