Sheer Lunacy, With Coins

We keep thinking it's all gone as low and weird as it possibly can, and then...This weekend, the purported GOP presidential candidate, aware of the serious issues facing our country, announced the launch of Trump Coins, "a true symbol of American greatness," featuring "my very beautiful face." Then he assured women, who are "DEPRESSED AND UNHAPPY" because Dems want to execute babies after birth, that he will "FIX ALL OF THAT" and "THIS NATIONAL NIGHTMARE WILL BE OVER." Whew. Not a moment too soon.

Saturday, Trump held a rally in battleground North Carolina. Conspicuously missing - oh to be a fly-on-the wall for that conversation - was GOP gubernatorial candidate, MAGA fan and self-described peeping "perv" Mark Robinson, under fire after newly reported lewd posts politely termed "disturbing" exposed how sick and loathsome he is. Praised by Trump as an "incredible gentleman" who's "better than Martin Luther King" because those are the only two Black people he knows of and anyway they're all kinda the same, Robinson was already trailing thanks to his anti-abortion, Holocaust-denying, gay-people-are-"filth" views. Now it turns out he visited a porn store almost nightly to view or buy "hard-core" porn, bragged he was a "Black Nazi" on a Nude Africa site, called MLK "a fucking commie bastard,” and urged the return of slavery: “I would certainly buy a few.” He has refused to leave the race and denied the "salacious tabloid lies" by telling supporters, "You know my words. You know my character." Uh huh.

True to his dubious mantra - distract, deflect, grift to cover legal fees - Trump popped up in the wake of the furor to hawk new Trump Coins, "a testament to (the) strength of the American people, our American patriots that we love so much" especially when rioting. Following in the tawdry trail of Trump steaks, sneakers, Bibles, playing cards and carved-up suit and boasting The Orange Guy on front and White House on back, the $100 trinkets are made of "99.9% pure silver" and bullshit, with "a beautiful proof finish...the highest standard in collectible medals" (sic). They come with "a premium custom felt pouch," a certificate of authenticity and his signature "to ensure you have purchased a Real Trump Coin. I've seen a lot of coins out there using my very beautiful face - I'm a very beautiful guy only kidding - but they are not the official coin." Because this coin is "something very special" that will "make history in America," he urges "you get yours as soon as it's released," right after he unveils his fab concept of a new health plan.

In case we're not convinced he's equipped to be president, he also issued an all-caps, barking-mad rant to American women who are "POORER THAN THEY WERE FOUR YEARS AGO," also "LESS HEALTHY," "LESS SAFE ON THE STREETS," "MORE DEPRESSED AND UNHAPPY...I WILL FIX ALL OF THAT, AND FAST, AND AT LONG LAST THIS NATIONAL NIGHTMARE WILL BE OVER. WOMEN WILL BE HAPPY, HEALTHY, CONFIDENT AND FREE. YOU WILL BE NO LONGER THINKING ABOUT ABORTION, BECAUSE IT IS NOW WHERE IT ALWAYS HAD TO BE WITH STATES - AND WITH POWERFUL EXCEPTIONS LIKE (THOSE) REAGAN INSISTED ON...BUT NOT ALLOWING FOR DEMOCRAT DEMANDED LATE TERM ABORTION IN THE 7TH, 8TH OR 9TH MONTH OR EVEN EXECUTION OF A BABY AFTER BIRTH. I WILL PROTECT WOMEN AT A LEVEL NEVER SEEN BEFORE...THEIR LIVES WILL BE HAPPY, BEAUTIFUL AND GREAT AGAIN!" Also, Bill Maher is "a befuddled mess" and the New York Times has "totally lost its way." Pot/kettle.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Still and all, there are rumored to be many remaining "undecided voters," a phenomenon we cannot begin to fathom. To them, we have to ask, "What the fuck is wrong with you?" For more evidence this "undecided" state makes less than no sense, we offer the latest video from Minnesota Nice governor, vice-presidential candidate and self-described “car guy” Tim Walz, who merges tips on fixing cruise control on his vintage 1979 International Harvester Scout - his dog Scout inside - with warning us of the fascist perils of Project 2025. "Look, to be able to work on this thing, you’ve got a manual," he says, bent under the hood to show us an old-school carburetor. "(Trump and Vance) have a manual, too. It’s called Project 2025, and it’s a way to stick it to the middle class while giving tax cuts to the wealthiest...They didn't give me a manual for this if you didn't plan on using it to fix your truck. And they didn't create that Project 2025 just to have it sit around as a doorstop." C'mon: You really can't choose between these guys?

With Trump now brazenly running as "a candidate openly for sale" to his major donors, at his North Carolina rally he predictably didn't mention Mark who? despite DNC billboards nearby quoting him saying "We have to cherish Mark," an "outstanding person." Because it's not a cult, MAGA-ites dismissed the Robinson news: "It's all speculation - where's the proof?" They also gave Trump a pass: "He's classy, he’s a gentleman, he looks good in a suit and he has strong values." Trump again "promised" to "protect women at a level never seen before. They will finally be healthy, hopeful, safe and secure...We're going to take care of you," presumably like he did with E. Jean Carroll and dozens of women. Then, wildly flapping small accordion hands, he stage-coaxed up his little granddaughter Carolina - "She's beautiful, she's sweet and she doesn't know how evil life is yet" - and cringingly held her as she squeaked, "Make America great again!" Ewwww. Suffer the little children, free them of these atrocities, end our national nightmare.