Be Of Good Cheer: Death Cult Christians Say Better To Go Home to the Lord (Albeit With COVID) Than Wear A Mask

And lo, the permutations of anti-mask/vax/reason/science crackpottery have been many, from world-wide hoax to heathen attack on godly bodily autonomy to conspiracy by Nazis and/or Commies, and yes, it's ongoing. In Iowa, after the Ankeny School Board voted to reinstate a mask mandate, tomahawk-toting QAnon freak Scott McKay, aka "Patriot Streetfighter," threatened "you forkin' scumbags will not walk away from this clean," even though his 81-year-old father died of COVID after attending one of his rallies; he blames the death on "deep-state motherfuckers." Orange County, CA. just saw its first trial of someone for refusing to don a mask - though she did wear a Trump skirt - in a grocery store while proclaiming her "freedom." California's also home to assorted madmen, a right-wing radio host who says he just got COVID on purpose to "walk the walk," and anti-vaxxers who've taken to stalking masked kids and parents en route to school. In one video, Shiva Bagheri, a former dog-walker/dance instructor now cleaning toilets and leading "Beverly Hills Freedom" rallies as a mission "from God" - who evidently told her this summer to punch a cancer patient outside her clinic - screamed at parents outside schools that they're "traumatizing" their kids by putting them in masks. "This is rape," she yelled. "They're going to rape their lives away." In Washington state, where a tiny group of cops and firefighters are quitting rather than get a damn shot for God's sake, a 22-year-veteran state trooper used his last radio call to have a hissy fit on camera and tell the governor to "kiss my ass"; about 20 of his colleagues solemnly gathered to drop off their boots and declare, "Our body is ours, it's God's gift to us." Within minutes of their departure, a group of young people scavenged the boots to give away, announcing, "We're glad we were able to save these shoes for people who actually need them, instead of being wasted for some dramatic, egotistical display."

Now, behold, God has entered the lunatic picture. In "the creepy, final stage of denial," The Federalist, after months of running stories about chicken-pox parties "to defeat the Wuhan Virus," has argued, "For Christians, death is good," which we guess makes the largely preventable demise, to date, of over 730,000 Americans great news all around. Thus does Joy Pullman, executive editor and "happy wife," chirpily quote, "Yes, we are of good courage, and we would rather be away from the body and at home with the Lord." In her nope-not-getting-desperate-here-at-all "reasoning," Pullman writes that "shaming" people for getting or dying from "a catchy virus" is a "manipulation tactic," the Bible repeatedly "rejects the heathen idea that death is to be avoided at any cost," and "God Decides When We Die, Not COVID. There is nothing we can do to make our days on earth one second longer or shorter" - a clear Biblical teaching "even this theologically basic laywoman knows thanks to parents who read the Bible to her growing up and excellent pastoral instruction since then," thank God. Though "The Path to Destruction Is Very, Very Popular," she goes on, "Christians are explicitly called to spurn pagans' approval, advice and beliefs," repent for "our refusal to preach and obey the clear teachings of the Bible amid the world's panic," and go quietly, drowning in their own lung fluid, unto death: "Then let us rejoice, and sin no more." We're guessing "Go for it" would be the likely response of the Liberal Redneck, who as a father has had it with anti-mask-and-vax "concerned parents" who are in fact "fucking slack-jawed, backward-ass, broke-brain, empty-headed, hate-filled lunatics." We offer a final, heartfelt if unholy Amen to him, and this heroic kid. He speaks for us all.