Tuesday, May 9, 2017
Lots of Copies Make Stuff Safe: Saving Trump's Bigly Dumb Words
Little Donny is busy. Tuesday he fired Comey - a brazen move dubbed a purge, a coup and "the most NIXON WATERGATE DEMOCRACY DIES IN DARKNESS thing since whatever Trump did yesterday." Monday, on the off chance he ever said anything stupid, his minions deleted all press releases before Jan 1. Enter the Internet Archive's Wayback Machine, which, facing a regime not so fond of free speech, had wisely backed them all up. Because the Internet never forgets.
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Sunday, May 7, 2017
Can't Stand No More: Another Hashtag, Another Black Kid Dies
His grieving family, teachers, football team and community have buried Jordan Edwards, 15, "a kid who did everything right" - except for his color - after a cop killed him for leaving a rowdy party. After police admitted their initial story was " unintentionally incorrect," the shooter was fired, then charged with murder. Still, says the family's lawyer, "America must figure out a way to police its citizens without killing them.” Because, duh, "Black boys deserve to grow up too."
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Friday, May 5, 2017
We Are A Pre-Existing Condition
Gone is that grotesque sea of smug, doughy, chortling, white men gleefully celebrating the "moral travesty" that will rob 24 million people of health care to give tax cuts to billionaires. Their execrable scam will gut coverage for dozens of "pre-existing" conditions from AIDS and addiction through cancer and yes pregnancy to seizures and schizophrenia. The mordant, furious response on social media is best summed up by Pierce's, "Goddamn them all." Time to make them pay.
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Tuesday, May 2, 2017
Wyoming Lives and Lets Tutu
In these mean times, a sliver of grace and good: After a Wyoming senator told students that "a guy who wears a tutu and goes to bars on Friday night" is "kind of" asking to be assaulted, supporters of LGBTQ equality - including many scruffy, smiling, boots-and-jeans-clad straight guys - took to wearing tutus to work, school and, yes, bars. There were also tutu-themed parties, game nights and bar discounts to urge Equality State residents to "show up for each other."
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Monday, May 1, 2017
Tweets of the Master Class: And Ten Dollars Extra, For Every Hundred Lashes
"Stop the Runaway" begins an 1804 newspaper ad urging like-minded souls to capture a "Mulatto Man Slave" - bonus 10 bucks for each lash of the whip! - escaped from one Andrew Jackson, unrepentant racist, unabashed owner of 160 slaves, blood-soaked creator of the Trail of Tears, soon-to-be 7th president, and fave role model for our dizzyingly ignorant 45th, who in a new interview blankly mused, "Why was there the Civil War?" So many facepalms, so little time.
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Friday, April 28, 2017
100 Days of Foul Stench, Unnecessary Cruelty and Pointless Pieces Of Paper
It feels like a decade, but it's been just 100 harrowing days of our resident bully, braggart, buffoon, narcissist and "racist scrotum dipped in Cheeto dust." When not ineptly stumbling from crisis to fiasco, he's busy signing papers asking his sycophants to figure out how to make America great again. For succor and solidarity on those (frequent days) when We...Just... Can't, we offer some eloquent critics and - because things can't any nuttier - Trump on the accordion. You're welcome.
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Thursday, April 27, 2017
Rising Up Together Against the Current Project For White Supremacy
Amidst the gleeful mockery of Trump's 100 Days of gibberish and failure, a reminder he's achieved one vicious thing: the persistent terrifying, demonizing and persecution of immigrants in the name of his "core political commitment" to white nationalism. To combat it, Rise Up and other rights groups plan a massive day of action on May 1 - and made a chilling new video - to remind those in power that an attack on anyone is "an attack on all of us."
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Fragrant Camouflage: In Honorable Opposition to State-Sponsored Fascism
With the sometime-enlightened Radiohead planning a July show in Tel Aviv, Israel, the band is facing a fierce campaign to cancel what some deem " a benefit show on behalf of Apartheid, ethnic cleansing and brutal occupation." Along with petitions and criticism by BDS advocates, 50 high-profile artists and activists just wrote an open letter exhorting them to "do what artists did in South Africa’s era of oppression: Stay away, until apartheid is over."
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Wednesday, April 26, 2017
Suffering Without Hate, Because "Tolerance, Dialogue and Patience Were Your Strongest Weapons.”
In a luminous, heartrending eulogy, the husband of police officer and LGBTQ advocate Xavier Jugelé, killed in an ISIS attack in Paris, said he suffers but will not hate: "I have no hatred, Xavier, because it is not like you and does not fit with what made your heart beat.” At a ceremony before scores of politicians and officers, Etienne Cardiles said his partner lived "a life of joy and immense smiles in which love and tolerance reigned as undisputed masters"; he ended with, "May peace prevail."
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Tuesday, April 25, 2017
Blame Canada's Dairy Farmers, Our Newest Randomly Selected Enemy
Because Little Donny saw a Fox News (sic) story he didn't quite get and needs a new distraction before Day 100, he's now attacking Canada (safer than North Korea, but WTF?), charging its longtime milk regulations are "very unfair" to Wisconsin dairy farmers. Fired up for a (wildly misinformed) trade war, he just slapped a duty on Canadian lumber and warned Canada's farmers and cows, "We will not stand for this. Watch!" - which they are now doing with a bemused horror familiar to many of us.
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