All Further Articles for 2020-11-24

Tuesday, November 24, 2020
Birds Of A Feather: Lame Duck Pardons Turkey And Everything's Fine Here Why Do You Ask?
Because things aren't weird enough, Tuesday saw the shabby, surreal spectacle of President Turkey congratulating Corn the Turkey - "Look at that beautiful, beautiful bird. Oh, so lucky. That is a lucky bird" - because he gets to live another day in the hellscape the guy pardoning him created. The ever-peculiar event was reportedly muted - no jokes, few cameras, loser city - but reporters loudly asked if he'd be pardoning himself. No answer. Maybe because, in truth, the sins are unpardonable.
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