The Unbearable Cluelessness of Being: En Route To the Hague!

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Photo by John Moore/Getty. Front photo by Lucy Nicholson/Reuters

It was bad enough the whole tacky grifter clan crashed the palace party in the U.K. on the taxpayers' dime - to the gaudy tune of at least $3.5 million - prompting many to wonder why the oafish Beavis, Butthead, Tiffany et al were all there, primping and posing in their gauche Dynasty-cum-Beverly Hillbillies outfits and setting new records in the annals of white trash nepotism. It became that much more heinous when the Sociopath-In Chief, in his ongoing quest to inflict cruelty on poor brown people, moved to strip English classes, legal aid, recreation programs and anything else "not directly necessary" from kids held in our concentration camps for (entirely legally) seeking a better life - with many wondering when food and water would be next.

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The barbaric decision came amidst grim reports of the trauma already inflicted on children in the horror-ridden, $500,00-a-day, John-Kelly-profiting Homestead Detention Center and too many other places: kids as young as 5 ripped from their parents, held illegally in isolation and concrete holding cells, sleeping on the floor, packed in stifling locked vans, bad or no medical care, depressed, abused, sobbing, with "fear on every face.""Of all the terrible fuckery undertaken by the savage cockfleas and cuntmites that make up the administration of awkwardly-dressed dump truck Donald Trump," writes a furious Rude Pundit, " the most clearly visible, most heinous, most just outright evil (is this) child abuse advocated, aided, and abetted by the federal government," all "to punish people for daring to bring their brown, bedraggled asses to darken our virgin white City on a Hill." Their "blithe assertion of brute power" against terrified kids, he concludes, renders them "abject, irredeemable dicks."

It also renders them responsible for whatever "dangerous future price we pay," notes Charlie Pierce. "We are taking poor, desperate people and, day after day, feeding them cause for deep resentment and hatred. People have long memories for that stuff." Given these unceasing, unconscionable crimes against humanity, many took grim comfort in the insensate prattling of Ivanka "Princess Complicit" Trump, The Woman Who Works and is gobsmackingly unaware of her own tawdry privilege, as she paraded around London posting pictures of herself in ritzy places and outfits - including a Cruella-de-Vil-polka-dot affair that led people to wonder how many puppies she killed for it - in "the worst 'What I Did This Summer' photo essay ever written." "WHY are you there?" asked one un-fan. And "Embarrassing America, one meeting at a time one of the great own-goals of all time," a giddy Twitter went berserk.

Ivanka was heading to an entrepreneurs' summit, because she plays one on TV. She evidently had no clue the Hague is home to the International Criminal Court, where most of the civilized world, devoutly wishing it to be, think she and her venal family belong. Thus, was she deliciously pilloried: "Fingers crossed...So you waived extradition...What are the charges...Voluntary surrender - didn't see that coming...Nice! Hopefully next stop will be Rikers...I hope the trial is swift and justice is served... Criminals incoming. Detain at once. We need you, Signed America...Where you actually belong, you fauxministic, fraudulent, sweatshop-owning shanda spawn. Shame on you all." In the wake of the latest three deaths in three days of innocent people in U.S. custody - a 40-year-old Honduran woman, a 33-year-old Salvadoran man, a 25-year-old transgender woman from El Salvador - the most devastating response came from Walter Shaub, honoring the youngest victims of this vile regime: "Juan de León Gutiérrez (age 6); Jakelin Caal Maquin (age 7); Felipe Gómez Alonzo (age 8); unidentified Guatemalan girl (age 10); Carlos Gregorio Hernández Vásquez (age 16); and unidentified Guatemalan child (age 2)." Truly, the Hague is too good for these monsters.

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Photo by Gregory Bull/AP

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