The Justice Is TAN

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Becoming the Supreme Supreme Court Justice. Photo by Pablo Martinez Monsivais/Getty

For those panicking about the state of the republic or Ruth Bader Ginsburg: We're likewise totally freaked for the former and can't vouch for anything, but the tenacious good Justice, who broke three ribs in a fall at her office Wednesday night, is reportedly home from the hospital,working as always, cracking jokes, and recovering well. Ginsburg, 85, had earlier beat both colon and pancreatic cancer - who DOES that? - and is known for her regular and empowering workouts with Bryant Johnson, a veteran of the Army Special Forces Airborne Unit who has been her personal trainer for 20 years. Johnson is also the author of The RBG Workout: How She Stays Strong … and You Can Too!, for which the justice wrote the foreword.

After news of her hospitalization broke, it seemed anyone worried about the country, the quickly-veering-right Supreme Court or the health of Notorious RBG - whose iconic status has already inspired a stirring documentary and a new action figure -  was either fantasizing about the Ginsburg/Kavanaugh dust-up that must have led to this, or frantically offering help. Swathe her in bubble wrap! Here, take our ribs or other organs, even while we're alive! Before the offers had subsided, Ginsburg was already back home, her strength no doubt bolstered by her faithful workouts with Johnson. Given the sensitivity of the rib area, he said, they will likely take it easy for a while, "and then we’ll pick back up just like we usually do." As to our anxiety levels, he offered sweet words of solace: "To all the stressed out people in America, remember that the justice is TAN. Now, I always use that acronym: TAN. She’s tough as nails. You think three ribs are going to stop Justice?"

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The RBG action figure

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