For anyone who hasn't been cowering in their cave lo these last long ugly months, Wednesday's news of multiple pipe bombs being mailed to high-profile Trump targets and Democratic figures - the Clintons, Obama, Holder, Wasserman Schultz, Maxine Waters, George Soros the day before, and the New York offices of CNN - was both less than shocking and, let's get real, disquietingly foreseeable. What did they think would come of President I'm-A-Nationalist's ceaseless stirring of his toxic brew of insults, jeers, threats and menacing lock-her-up-and-get-'em-outta-here rhetoric about "the good old days" - most recently, last week when he smilingly praised Montana's GOP thug Greg Gianforte, convicted of body-slamming a Guardian reporter, as "my kind of guy" - if not just such an "act of terror"?
Even amidst the current turmoil, the day's events prompted a Vonnegut-worthy treasure trove of ironies. They ranged from the fundraising letter Lara Trump sent out, two hours after CNN offices were forcibly evacuated, declaring, “It’s time for us to give the media another wake-up call from the American people,” to the fact that Fox News received on-air word of the bombs as they were breathlessly jabbering about "left-wing mobs" confronting poor ole evil Mitch "Call Me Turtle" McConnell at dinner, which has gotta be more uncivil than trying to strip millions of Americans of health care and other basic rights. As they tsk-tsked about "fringe people on both sides" who "need to tamp it down," and one panelist approvingly cited Trump-inspired "anger at the other actors in politics,” and another noted his fear that rabid lefty "intimidation will turn to violence," they abruptly cut away to...news of Democrats targeted by bombs.
Still, came multiple, knee-jerk protestations, it was all a liberal hoax, a "false flag." Of reports of attempted attacks on "Debbie blabbermouth Schultz" et al, feverishly argued Rush Limbaugh on 600 stations nationwide, "It just might serve a purpose...There's a smell test this stuff has to pass, and, so far, a lot of people's noses are in the air...Republicans just don't do this kind of thing." He cited "Mrs. Clinton herself who said that being uncivil (is) proper and understandable," and Clinton operatives at Trump rallies, "paying people to draw swastikas on American flags, trying to make them look like deranged Trump supporters." On wingnut sites, conspiracy crackpots dutifully echoed him. From one: "I call BS. This is a setup by Soros to make it seem that the right is out to get him. Typical BS from leftists to play the victim...Too many discrepancies." The next: "Agree! What are the chances George Soros has a public mailbox outside his front door and no surveillance camera? Zero!"
Meanwhile, hours after a lunatic sent pipe-bombs to people and companies he's attacked and insulted and threatened for two years, our own li'l Benito spoke at yet another rally, this time in Wisconsin, nobly proclaiming, "We want all sides to come together in peace and harmony." Then he translated his lofty message into Trump-eze: It's all the Democrats' and media's fault. “Those engaged in the political arena must stop treating political opponents as being morally defective...The media also has a responsibility to set a civil tone and to stop the endless hostility and constant negative and oftentimes false attacks and stories.” After the crowd indulged in a brief, fond "Lock her up" chant, he also took a few minutes to call Sen. Tammy Baldwin a “radical far-left opponent” who wants a “socialist takeover” of health care, though, given the news, he was "trying to say that very nicely.” Most vitally, he argued America settles its differences “peacefully at the ballot box,” an opportunity - take note - coming right up. Later, police released a sketch of the suspect behind the day's act of terror. We hope they catch him.