Historic: Too Much Winning

Tarp City, still. Photo by Dennis Rivera/AP

On the first grim anniversary of Hurricane Maria making landfall, as Puerto Rico remains in tarp-strewn ruins, many survivors lack reliable power or water, and scores of the hundreds of thousands who fled now face homelessness, a determinedly amnesiac White House press release boasted that "President Donald J. Trump's Administration Has Helped Lead a Historic Recovery Effort in Puerto Rico" in "the largest and longest Federal response to a disaster in the history of the United States." As part of that yuge effort, they sent Ben "I Am Also Under Investigation" Carson to Puerto Rico, where he failed to mention the 3,000 people who died, maybe because his boss think they're faking it, but did offer the island $1.5 billion in recovery funds, or slightly below the $94.4 billion they have said they need to rebuild. He also bragged about "how we have pulled together as one, island and the mainland alike.”.

Many disagreed with all this pulling together gibberish, including those on social media who vowed, "We will mourn...and we will vote," Amnesty International, who projected the death toll on Trump's hotel; and San Juan Mayor Carmen Yulin Cruz, who furiously slammed Trump's recovery effort as, in truth, "a historic failure...He can spin it any way he wants, but this is his Katrina." Still, the clown leader didn't notice because he was busy going to Las Vegas to rally his sheep, where his opening speaker was a batshit wingnut conspiracy theorist he had requested. After the crowd chanted "Lock her up!" and "Build that wall!" - yes, still - Trump said he is taking care of veterans "for the first time in a long time" and called Brett Kavanaugh "a fine fine person...one of the finest human beings you will ever have the privilege of knowing" and happily imagined when Dean Heller, the guy he was selling, would come to him and say, “Mr. President, stop winning so much. The people of Nevada can’t take it any longer.” Actually....Mr. President, none of us can take it any longer. Are we almost done?

Photo by Sarah Voisin/Washington Post/Getty

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