For Mirth Becomes A Feast: Tiny Trump Draws As Finland Battles Moldova For Coveted Second Place

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Tiny Trump Draws

Presser/Russia/Dreamers/the appalling new low of proclaiming the press the Enemy of the American people as evinced in the bizarre "Mainstream Media Accountability Survey" - has it all got you down? Soothe your soul with the ever-enterprising national, global and yea cosmic ridicule raining down on our orange pretender. The trolling of Trump, alternately savage to antic, takes new forms daily. Among the hashtags, videos and memes - and we have the best, really - are Trump Draws, I Call My Own Shots, Tiny Trump, Fine Tuned Machine and, most ambitiously, Every Second Counts, an entire website devoted to over 30 countries arguing, each via their own brilliant parody video addressed to "Dear Mr. President," why they should be voted #2 after America gets to be #1 again. Born of a collaboration among European late-night shows vowing, "We're gonna ridicule the shit out of the President of the United States" - and with a focus that remains on Europe - these guys aren't fooling around.

Their videos feature high production values, Trumpian narrations, proud historical overviews - Morocco had "just like you, one of the best slavery businesses in the 1700s" - helpful clarifications - "Our country is Iran, not Iraq - it's not the one you attacked"- relevant prejudices - Finland, which also has an orange president, is "the best country in Europe, better than Denmark, which we call 'Stupid Sweden'"- and bragging rights - Australia has no wall but a rabbit-proof fence, "and we made the rabbits pay for it." Germany's and Switzerland's shpiels made the rounds, and Samantha Bee let Scotland speak, but powerful arguments remain from Armenia, Slovakia, Iceland, Malta, Namibia and Lithuania - which graciously agrees to accept 3rd place, seeing as its president was (also) impeached for intimacy with Russia and it's "in the very center of Europe -  amazing!" Finally, a compelling plea from Mars: "We are the best planet in the solar system. It's true! Other planets suck." It methodically bad-mouthes each in turn - "Do you see a sea on Venus? No, I know - FAKE NEWS," "Pluto is tiny. No one likes tiny - you could take Pluto in one of your huge hands and shove it up Uranus" - before reminding Trump they will still be there if America blows up, "which would totally be someone else's fault...Probably Mexicans." Or the media.

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