Fracking For President WTF?

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Like your choices weren't pitiable enough before, now some gas and oil industry pimps in Texas have launched a mock independent bid for the presidency on behalf of - wait for it - fracking. The stunt is part of, a new website by the “grassroots" (read astro-turf industry front) group North Texans for Natural Gas (NTNG), which with the support of four energy companies seeks to “give a voice to those who support natural gas." Aimed at millennials and dedicated to the gonzo proposition that fracking brings you everything good in life - gas, A.C., housing, health care, vacations, burgers, Christmas, celebrity life styles and don't forget clean water -  the site uses laughable memes, quizzes, listicles and other fun stuff to "explain the benefits of fracking to a new generation of Americans." "Energy is everywhere," it exclaims, and if you look around you'll find life itself on God's green earth, including the toxic water, is “Brought To You By Fracking.”

Thus does the site teach us that Fracking Is Good for Texas Water! 12 Reasons Why the Barnett Shale Is Such A Big Fracking Deal! Science Proves Fractivists Wrong About Water Contamination! Fracktivist Celebrities Say the Darnedst Things! And whatever you do, don't listen: "The fracking-enabled shale revolution has been undeniably positive for American jobs and the economy," the site earnestly argues. "But the "radical...'keep it in the ground' movement will stop at nothing to stop everything." Given the momentum of that movement - in Texas, New York and elsewhere -'s Bill McKibben see the effort by fossil fuel giants to masquerade as grassroots groups "inextricably bogus." Says Earthwork's Sharon Wilson, “It’s a wounded animal striking back.” Its latest desperate wacky act is the video announcing, "Proven candidate launches bid for highest office in land." And hey, at this point, why the frack not.

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