On the Inexecrable Narcissistic Man-Baby: Jon Stewart Speaks


After too many months of straight-faced news "analyses" of jaw-dropping Trump "policies" - from treating the U.S. economy like a cash-poor casino to his stupid Ugly American wall to reverting to a pouty ugly 10 year-old playground bully's snit whenever anyone dares to question his batshit judgment - it was swell to hear Jon Stewart pop up on the airwaves after a too-long absence to speak rude tough truth to the currently lunatic incarnation of power. Appearing on David Axelrod's live "Axe Files" podcast at the University of Chicago's Institute of Politics, Stewart offered up straight-talking clarity and a good dollop of profanity with a fine rant on the "unrepentant narcissistic asshole" that is "Fuckface von Clownstick" and how the media, Democrats and GOP are all in part responsible.

Seeking political correctness, he wondered if he should use the term "man-baby" or "baby-man" to describe a guy with "the physical countenance of a man and a baby's temperament and hands," thus noting that the presumptive GOP nominee is such a thin-skinned hypocrite he's still sulking about a joke someone made about his hands 25 friggin' years ago. Admitting he didn't realize how broken America's electoral industrial complex was until he left TV - his brief lobbying for 911 responders taught him Congress was "a cesspool" - he laid blame on not just the GOP clown car and a pandering media that steadfastly ignores Drumpf's ridiculousness, but on Democrats who have lost their way.

"The door is open to an asshole like Donald Trump because the Democrats haven't done enough to show people that government can be effective for people," he said. "And if you can't do that, then you've lost the right to make that change and someone's going to come in and demagogue you." He remains likewise unimpressed by Clinton, who he calls "a  very bright woman without the courage of her convictions - because I'm not even sure what they are."

Before voting for Donald Trump, Stewart cracked, he'd vote for the mohawked, wrestling, gold-chained Mr. T. Then again, he doesn't have to: Lest we forget, yet one more poll has found Hillary barely squeaking by the fit-throwing man-baby in a general election, and Bernie hammering him. Welcome back, Jon. But please take note.

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Jon does Trump (with the help of Cheetos) on Colbert. Front illustration by Victor Juhasz.

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