CIA Teleported Obama to Mars At Least Twice. Or Not.

Abby Zimet

Two time-traveling “chrononauts” who took part in a secret CIA intergalactic program in the early 1980s say they encountered President Obama, aka Barry Soetero, at least twice at U.S. facilities on Mars after he was teleported there by a “jump room” for a perilous mission to establish a defense regime, during which his primary task was "to be seen and not eaten." The White House has denied the claim, though they admit the young Obama once watched "Marvin the Martian.” Of course, you'd expect them to. Still, time travel might help explain how a former constitutional law professor could subsequently blatantly disregard so many fundamental legal rights and principles once he gained power as president.

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