The Two Hands God Gave You: Soccer and America's Slide Into Socialism

by
Abby Zimet

In belated tribute to the Women's World Cup and our own very cool neighborhood Soccer Barn, Billy Bob Neck's take on how soccer is leading America to hell, an armless one at that, filled with Mexicans from Brazil.

"What letter does Socialism start with? S. What letter does Satan start with? S. What letter does sodomy start with? S. What letter does soccer start with? I'm gonna give you a great big guess on that one...It's a S. Do you think this is some kind of co-in-ci-dence or somethin'?"

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