Pedophile Island

by
Abby Zimet

For
those who need more political whackos in your day than Rand Paul,
consider California GOP gubernatorial candidate Douglas Hughes. His main campaign
promise is to exile sexual offenders to Santa Rosa Island - to be
renamed Pedophile Island - where within their "island society" they will
farm, ranch, build housing, choose police, firemen, fish and game
agents, write their own Constitution, and "live out their existence...
away from our precious children" to the end of their sorry days. Another
idea: triple, 12-foot, razor-wired, moat-laced, motion-sensored 
fencing along the border to keep out illegal immigrants, gangs,
prostitutes and "exotic animals." Also: mandatory one-year engagement -
preferably two - because people who get divorced get depressed and see
doctors who give them medicine that could make them addicted. We love
democracy.

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