A large stash of beer. Rags gets the cheapest stuff
you can find, like Old Milwaukee Light; Suit gets to drink whatever
import he asks for; the jeans get to pick their favorite domestic
brand, but they are required to pay for all the beer and the Li'l
Rules of the Game.
1. Whenever George W uses the phrases: "national security," "tax relief," "activist judges," or "affordable health care," drink two shots of beer.
2. Whenever George W mentions the tragic events of 9/11, the last person to grab a toothpick, stand, and salute must drink three shots of beer. If you stab yourself in forehead with the toothpick, drink two more shots.
3. If George W actually says, "If Al Qaeda is calling you, we want to
know why." first person to finish a whole beer gets to toss Li'l
at any of the others until they finish their beer. Use the toothpicks.
4. If George W makes up a word like "strategerie" or "deteriorize,"
four shots of beer.
5. If George W speaks of Hamas and repeats his earlier statement that
"it's good to see people are demanding honest leadership," the first
person to stop laughing gets to drink one shot of beer then pummel Suit
with empty shot glass. No head shots.
6. Whenever George W talks about bi-partisanship, the last person to
grab his throat in a choking motion has to eat 4 Li'l Smokies.
7. If either the Vice President Dick Cheney or First Lady Laura Bush
caught napping, last person to sing "Wake Up Little Susie, Wake Up,"
to drink three shots of beer.
8. Predict the number of applause breaks. Person closest to correct
number may then force the other three to drink that number of shots of
beer in whatever ratio they wish.
9. Three shots of beer if he mentions New Orleans.
Five shots of beer if he mentions Brownie. Two full beers if he
10. Every time Tom DeLay is shown in the audience, take turns throwing
Li'l Smokies at the TV. Suit sits out. First face hit doesn't have to
drink two shots of beer. Every time Hillary Clinton is shown in the
audience, Suit throws Li'l Smokies at the TV. If he hits her face,
everyone else drinks two shots of beer.
Use the toothpicks.
11. Whenever George W quotes the Bible, last person to fall to their
knees and cry "Hallelujah!" drinks two shots of beer.
12. Whenever George W smirks during a standing ovation, take turns
drinking shots of beer until the audience sits down. Do it double time
if his shoulders shake with silent laughter.