An Open Letter to God, From Michael Moore

Sunday, August 31st, 2008

Dear God,

The other night, the Rev. James Dobson's ministry asked all believers
to pray for a storm on Thursday night so that the Obama acceptance
speech outdoors in Denver would have to be cancelled.

I see that You have answered Rev. Dobson's prayers -- except the
storm You have sent to earth is not over Denver, but on its way to New
Orleans! In fact, You have scheduled it to hit Louisiana at exactly the
moment that George W. Bush is to deliver his speech at the Republican
National Convention.

Now, heavenly Father, we all know You have a great sense of humor
and impeccable timing. To send a hurricane on the third anniversary of
the Katrina disaster AND right at the beginning of the Republican
Convention was, at first blush, a stroke of divine irony. I don't blame
You, I know You're angry that the Republicans tried to blame YOU for
Katrina by calling it an "Act of God" -- when the truth was that the
hurricane itself caused few casualties in New Orleans. Over a thousand
people died because of the mistakes and neglect caused by humans, not
You.

Some of us tried to help after Katrina hit, while Bush ate cake with McCain
and twiddled his thumbs. I closed my office in New York and sent my
entire staff down to New Orleans to help. I asked people on my website
to contribute to the relief effort I organized -- and I ended up
sending over two million dollars in donations, food, water, and supplies
(collected from thousands of fans) to New Orleans while Bush's FEMA ice
trucks were still driving around Maine three weeks later.

But this past Thursday night, the Washington Post reported that the
Republicans had begun making plans to possibly postpone the convention.
The AP had reported that there were no shelters set up in New Orleans
for this storm, and that the levee repairs have not been adequate. In
other words, as the great Ronald Reagan would say, "There you go
again!"

So the last thing John McCain and the Republicans needed was to have
a split-screen on TVs across America: one side with Bush and McCain
partying in St. Paul, and on the other side of the screen, live footage
of their Republican administration screwing up once again while New
Orleans drowns.

So, yes, You have scared the Jesus, Mary and Joseph out of them, and
more than a few million of your followers tip their hats to You.

But now it appears that You haven't been having just a little fun
with Bush & Co. It appears that Hurricane Gustav is truly heading
to New Orleans and the Gulf coast. We hear You, O Lord, loud and clear,
just as we did when Rev. Falwell said You made 9/11 happen because of
all those gays and abortions. We beseech You, O Merciful One, not to
punish us again as Pat Robertson said You did by giving us Katrina
because of America's "wholesale slaughter of unborn children." His
sentiments were echoed by other Republicans in 2005.

So this is my plea to you: Don't do this to Louisiana again. The
Republicans got your message. They are scrambling and doing the best
they can to get planes, trains and buses to New Orleans so that
everyone can get out. They haven't sent the entire Louisiana National
Guard to Iraq this time -- they are already patrolling the city
streets. And, in a nod to I don't know what, Bush's head of FEMA has
named a man to help manage the federal government's response. His name
is W. Michael Moore. I kid you not, heavenly Father. They have sent a man with both my name AND W's to help save the Gulf Coast.

So please God, let the storm die out at sea. It's done enough damage
already. If you do this one favor for me, I promise not to invoke your
name again. I'll leave that to the followers of Rev. Dobson and to
those gathering this week in St. Paul.

Your faithful servant and former seminarian,

Michael Moore
MMFlint@aol.com
MichaelMoore.com

P.S. To all of God's fellow children who are reading this, the city New Orleans has not yet recovered from Katrina. Please click here
for a list of things you can do to help our brothers and sisters on the
Gulf Coast. And, if you do live along the Gulf Coast, please take all
necessary safety precautions immediately.