The locals, fearing a Soviet invasion, form a militia equipped with shotguns, hot tempers, and misconceptions. At the film's climax, there is a tense standoff with the Russians and Americans staring down the barrels of each other's guns. A young boy who has climbed a nearby church steeple for a better view slips. All eyes turn upward. For a few breathtaking minutes he hangs suspended.

Then, spontaneously, the Russian sailors and the locals form a human chain and rescue the boy, and everyone learns a lesson about our common humanity. Happy ending.

''The Russians are Coming'' was a comedy with a message. Today - with 116 Russian sailors trapped beneath the Barents Sea in a nuclear-powered sub that sank last weekend - no one is laughing. But there are messages here, too.

The United States has offered to assist. Though the Russians have so far demurred, we should be glad for the political changes that make cooperation a possibility. But the irony is deep and disturbing. If equipped with nuclear missiles (the Russians say it is not), the Kursk, one of Russia's most modern subs, would be capable of killing millions of Americans within minutes. US submarines are capable of returning the favor. Yet, the United States stands ready to help save men trained to deliver a devastating nuclear strike against it.

Why? Perhaps the answer lies in the fact that a million lives are an abstraction. One hundred sixteen souls trapped in a submarine are not. We are drawn to their plight by our common humanity. But, the explosion and subsequent sinking of the Kursk is also a reminder of the fragility of nuclear deterrence and our willingness (and that of Russia) to toy with the fate of the earth in the name of national security. It is worth considering a series of what-ifs.

What if the Kursk is carrying nuclear missiles? What if the accident had occurred at the onset of the Balkans war when Boris Yeltsin was reminding the world that Russia had a powerful nuclear arsenal? What if the accident had occurred in 1990 when Mikhail Gorbachev was briefly removed from power during an aborted coup? What if the accident left the Kursk stranded, yet still able to fire its missiles?

What would the Russian commander do under extreme duress, at a time of political crisis, and without communications? What if the crew panicked? What if the Kursk had accidentally collided with a US submarine in the area as happened in 1993 when the USS Grayling collided with a Russian Delta-3 class nuclear powered submarine? Can we be sure the incident would have ended peacefully as it did then? What if such a collision occurred at a time of heightened tensions during an international crisis?

The Kursk is only the latest in a series of Russian submarine accidents dating back to 1961, some of which have involved nuclear weapons that have either been inadvertently jettisoned (without exploding) or sank with their ship. In 1986 a Soviet sub carrying at least 32 nuclear warheads sank off Bermuda, and in 1977 a Soviet submarine accidentally jettisoned a nuclear warhead that was later recovered. Another Russian sub sank off Norway in 1989 and continues, according to Norwegian officials, to leak radiation from its nuclear reactor and nuclear tipped torpedos.

In addition to these dangers, dozens of decommissioned nuclear-powered submarines lie in Russian ports rusting and abandoned. Lack of money prevents the Russians from taking steps to prevent potential radiation disasters.

Let's hope the Russian sailors will be rescued. Let's hope the nuclear reactors aboard will pose no radiation risk. Let's hope this incident will have a safe ending.

''The Russians are Coming!'' had a happy ending. But not all scripts are written in Hollywood. As long as we continue our misguided romance with nuclear weapons, we court disaster. Russian roulette doesn't always have a happy ending.

Michael Christ is executive director and Peter Zheutlin is associate program director of International Physicians for the Prevention of Nuclear War.

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