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Guns Save Lives Part Gazillion, Except, Actually, They Don't

by Abby Zimet

Even as schools continue to debate how best to confront gun violence, the latest senseless school shooting - in which a 12-year-old killed one and wounded two at a Nevada middle school before turning the gun on himself - barely made a ripple in Monday's headlines. Of course the NRA has the answer - more guns! - which is why they've declared Guns Save Lives Day for the day after the one-year anniversary of the Sandy Hook slaughter of 26 innocent people, 20 of them children, with guns, "because we are not going to let the gun prohibition lobby own (the day)...We are going to use (it) to get our views out." (The original date set was the anniversary itself, but after some critics inexplicably called the choice insensitive, it was changed.) The event will "honor" Newtown victims, organizers say, "by doing everything within our power to prevent misguided gun control laws from leaving Americans defenseless or worse victims." And now the brilliant, down-is-up minds at the NRA have come up with an ever better idea to protect our children: Make sure teachers point guns at them through the school day. From The Onion.

“The only way to ensure safety in our schools is to make sure teachers hold fully loaded firearms at students from the moment they walk into the classroom until the moment they leave...If teachers need to write on the board or turn the page of a textbook, they should always use their free hand while keeping the gun at face level of all students and holding one finger firmly on the trigger."

Update: A new study finds that 7.500 children are admitted to hospitals each year with gunshot wounds, usually from hand guns, and 500 of them die, an increase that relfects a "disturbing trend." Entirely unsurprisingly, the more guns in a state, the more kids get shot.

Ed's Note: Fyi, this is real.