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Tennessee's Monkey Bill: Marching Backwards As Fast As We Can

by Abby Zimet

Having narrowly escaped falling off the edge of the earth, Tennessee's creationism-happy Senate has approved the so-called monkey bill, allowing teachers to discuss the "strengths" and "weaknesses" of "controversial" topics like "evolution," as well as "global warming," in order to help their students "improve their thinking skills" and realize once and for all that the miraculous earth was shaped with a magical touch of a godly finger, even though a gazillion scientific and legal experts say the bill is "unnecessary, anti-scientific, and very likely unconstitutional." Also dumb. State legislators are also busy enacting other useful bills, such as allowing the Ten Commandments to be displayed on public buildings, banning the word and concept "gay" and telling girl athletes what they can and can't wear, for which acts we and the Lord thank them. Sort of.

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