At the risk of invoking Godwin's Law, I have only one more thing to say about the Catholic Church "fighting evil": "Pope Pius XII."

What do call a Nazi is a swim suit?

D n G -- I'm LOL, we need this and more humor!

Did you see the movie "DOGMA", it has a marvelously twisted irony in it when the nastiest of evil spirits attacks the protagonists, and when all else looks to be completely over and final and doomed to ever lasting defeat - the dude yanks out Geo Carlin character's golf club - and slays the innate evil.

Geo's role was the Roman Catholic Bishop, who loved his golf, and had committed the horrendously EVIL sacrilege of blessing his clubs (with holy water) to do better in his game! The protagonists has guessed this subtle truth, and stolen the golf club iron to battle the ultimate in EVIL.

Namaste … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … … Mahatma Gandhi … … … … … … … … … …
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Holy Crap! If this story is true, the Catholics are even more whacked out than I give them credit for! BTW, what do you call a Nazi with a $5000 hat?

Hey does the green puke and the spinning head come with this deal?

No, but witch burning is on the menu.

Send a few of these guys to the U.S. Congress. It needs and exorcism. It's too late to cleanse the Executive Branch. It sold its soul some years back.

The Vatican should start the exorcism at home --
and then move on to the White House!!

Does this mean the priests will now spend more time trying to stop little girls heads from spinning around and less time using their penises to push the Devil back up little boy's butts?

...trained in exorcism and on hand to take action against "extreme Godlessness"--

Maybe these priests will be chaplains in the liberal internment camps.

This is from the Onion, right?

This pope who worked for years in the office descended from that of the Grand Inquisitor, will be going way beyond exorcisms to real persecution of non christians. He is setting the stage.

I've always wanted to be a Viking.
Anybody out there know where I can get the training I need to follow this calling?

The harsh truth is that the Devil loves it when people belittle organizations like NAMBLA and its leaders–instead of trying to understand them.

If Bush were really possessed by the Devil, then he'd be a lot smarter

It appears as if the Pope is trying to get the Catholic Church to complete a "Great Lurch Backward." Chairman Mao has nothing on Pope Benedict II.

To those bible bangers who never bother to read all of the book they wave around in people's faces, the "devil" was originally used figuratively in the bible to represent evil. It was the Catholic church, in their on-going attempt to instill fear in the faithful and keep them in line with scare tactics, that strove to embody this symbolism into Satan, and also to promote the idea of hell -- the concept of which is stark evidence of just how sick the human mind, where the concept originated, can be. This has of course been taken up by their Protestant ilk for the same reason. Of course, the devil also serves as a tool to insure and promote sexism and untold numbers of free-thinking women were burned at the stake due to "demonic possession". (Where were all the exorcists then?)
Now, just who IS the devil? According to over a billion Muslims the United States is the Great Satan. Indeed, the devil can be anyone you want to demonize to promote your own political, religious or economic agenda. But mainly, Satan is a tool for the business of religion -- a convenient scapegoat, alibi and apology for theologies that make absolutely no sense at all.
Ooops, the devil made me write this.....

I can see it on their website now...

"Blackwater to Employ Vatican Trained Ex-Exorcists: Opens New Front in GWOT.

BW Chaplain Corps: "Our God or yours, Making Sure We're on His Side"

'father gabriele amorth,82, the exorcist in chief' - is 82 his age or his holy number? to take action against 'extreme godlessness'. well, they'd better come and sort me out then............
kem patrick where are you? we need your humour on this one..........

It is amazing that such a large organization which is ordained by the Vatican can dispense such superficial nonsense. If they were really interested in promoting peace in the world, instead of their true goal of maintaining their wealth and status, then they would put all of their resources and apply all of their effort into a unified goal of fixing one impoverished country so that true evil would be in abeyance on at least that local front.

If they had anyone in their employ who had any brains, they would realize that their best choice for beginning such nation repair would be Haiti. If Haiti was treed and modernized with non-polluting energy technology, then it would be reasonable to expect that a moral society could be grown there which would reflect favorably on the Catholic Church.

Reducing evil and impoverishment in the world by one country at a time is the most logical route to a truly just world society. Each country rescued makes the future task less difficult, since the rescued countries would eventually employ themselves in that same enterprise and the strength of good in the world will grow exponentially.

Just when you thought the world could not possibly get any stupider.

In an effort to out-stupid the Islamic and Protestant Fundamentalists the Catholic Church goes retrograde.

What next?

Tying stones to suspected witches and throwing them into the river, just like Olde Tymes?

God's Rotweiler......... This man reverts to form. The Congregation of the Doctrine of the Faith is literally the last remnant of the Inquisition. The appointment of Ratsinger as pope is indeed a great leap backward into the dark days of the inquisition. The CDF was actually established at the end of the inquisition and formed the court of last resort for those accused of hearesy..... Nevertheless this is a frightening development in an age of increasingly strident religious extremism. The dark ages are again upon us. In this time of apocalyptic events such as global warming, energy shortages, impending food shortages as a result of both climate change and the misguided push toward biofuels, over population and the resulting clash of civilizations, and impending plagues, the stage is set for the wackos to attribute all these problems to "evil"....... and react in their usual irrational ways to cleanse the world of evil......themselves becoming the embodyment of that evil.
A frightening prospect to say the least.........

Howard

Become an atheist and screw organized religion. All organized religion is is a way to keep the masses in fear of the unknown and thus control them.

Mankind has to come up with a better way to promote brotherhood. Religion is not the way.

Shouldn't they use nuns instead of preists?
Females are more qualified to detect devils.

What a colossal, insulting waste of time and energy.
It seems to me that the Church needs to be employing Board Certified Psychiatrists to help people that ask for help.

JOHNWYCLIF

try: www.norsehenchmen.com

OLDRASCAL

if the vatican were to release the dead sea scrolls they have, then all this stupid religion business would probably come to an end. (but of course that is not about to happen)

KEM PATRICK

welcome back.

Well thank god somebody is going to finally do something about the anti-christ GWB. They said they were going to fight evil right? Like DU? This must include VP Cheney who has the habit of shooting his friends with a shotgun and pretty much everybody in the Administration.

Oh, I forgot. This is religious dogma trying to herd us back to the dark ages. Be fruitful and multiply right? Ignorance is knowledge (no internet) remember?

The first place the Catholic Church needs to look for Satanism is under the robe of it's very own priests. Just what we need: the religion of pedophiles telling us how to stop evil.

If you believe in religion instead of reasoning things out, you all deserve to go extinct from global warming.

That's what I think.

mackgillicuddy:
"The harsh truth is that the Devil loves it when people belittle organizations like the Catholic Church and its leaders–instead of trying to understand them."

Understand them in terms of what they say, Mack? Or trying to reconcile what they say with what they do? There is a difference--in case you were unaware.

And maybe you can help us understand what they have in mind by certifying more exorcists: a new marketing tool, perhaps?

post by conscience,everything that needed to be said,"start at vatican,move on to whitehouse"

Good point WMC. You can bet the standard fee for an exorcism will be in the thousands of dollars and the Pope always gets a cut of the take, burning candels and selling holy water, icons and Pope pictures. They need the money to restock their coffers. They had to pay out billions for the child abuse lawsuits.

The same types who see the Virgin Mary crying in a pile of cow pies, will have their kids who are brain damaged from sniffing glue exorcised. I'd like to have my wife's house cat un-demonized, wonder what the fee for that would be. For the right price, some of the so called Christians will do most anything. ___ Churches are the devil's domain.

Hi COCO, __ do you still love me?

According to Elaine Pagals, "Satan" sort of grew out of Judas the betrayer of Jesus, and was used as a designation for "others" (like Jews who didn't convert to Christianity) who killed Jesus.

IVIRICH, SAMSKI & STONE TOOL: Good points. As an astrologer, "the first heretic," those in my field recognize that the church has a long history of MURDERING those who choose to seek higher metaphysical/esoteric causes for the strange ways and means of this world. Like all authoritarian institutions, the church will brook no opposition or questioning of ITS claim to Divine, unimpeachable authority. I have met people who accuse me of being a "devil worshipper" because they are ill-informed and have been given dangerous, bogus information by their church leaders that lumps all who work with oracles or study the ancient mapping systems as erroneously worshipping the devil.

I see evil as a palpable force, but the personification into a devil seems very primitive to me. The archetypal energies that relate to the planets in the astrological paradigm are just that, archetypal energies. Does evil choose a singular archetypal form in which to express, or are there numerous areas which--when taken to the max--cause others pain, thus diversifying the nature and expression of evil.

Living in the Bible Belt, the need to keep what I do under a cloak, to BE low profile is real and has been for a decade. Since my TV show on astrology was canceled in l994-l995 which is also when Clear Channel became active in buying out all Florida radio stations of any significance, I personally saw all venues close off to me. Anyone with left leaning views, progressive values, interest in alternative technologies, and most especially, the esoteric is lucky to get any media time these days. The land of the free is a joke, and it's fallen under a dark shadow of ignorance, fueled by irrational fears and prejudice.

The Course in Miracles says there are only 2 emotions: Love, which all the masters championed, and Fear (which can manifest as hatred, or other forms of enmity). Interesting how the Catholic church chooses the latter, for isn't that what the entire basis of exorcism is couched in? People with profound mood swings caused by poor diet and low blood sugar can today be called bipolar and given drugs to manage their behavior, OR they may be called possessed. Why bother looking at diet to determine cause, when there are so many evils seeking targets? Soon they'll call back the incubus and succubus... and then, who knows, when the "reality TV shows" become too banal, real witch burnings may begin to proceed. I do NOT rule it out given the degree of religious based ignorance that's come to pass for norms in too many regions.

Will our 'faith based' interrogators be using the rack instead of the water board?

Can't Wrath Slinger sell indulgences to raise money just like the old time religion?

Well, there difinently is a Satan, lucifer. He is as real as God and of course for those who choose ro believe there is no God, they also won't believe there is a devil, and or his demons, who can possess people and take full control of their souls.

But that's religious talk and one either believes in a supreme being or rejects it, that is our choice. I know one thing, Siouxrose is not posessed by anything except love and compassion for others and she has a message, at times difficult to understand. Ya gotta think there. I also believe churches are the devil's hangout, the richer the church, the funnier the hats, the more often he hangs out there.

PACPLYER

yeah, but those bloody religionists are going to take us with them. the global warming doesn't discriminate............

KEM PATRICK

you obviously haven't been reading my posts on other topics, or you would know i still (and always) love you. even though you are a one eyed, toad skinned, cleft footed vietnam war veterinarian.

"fight the Devil head-on" HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD, HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD, HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD, HEAD-ON APPLY DIRECTLY TO THE FOREHEAD...

I guess the really sad thing about this story is that the Church still thinks anyone in this country really believes and practices what they say. If I had a nickel for every Catholic friend who is on the Pill, been divorced, done drugs, or read their horoscope online, well, I wouldn't have to write this, I'd be in Paris buying overpriced wine by the glass.
Every person I know who grew up in this religion is either cherry-picking what the wingnuts at the Vatican say and living life the way THEY want, or trying to explain to other people why their priest was transfered after that "unfortunate incident" happened at camp/church/basketball practice/catachism class/alterboy training when they were younger. My own best friend was told to stay away from a certain priest in his church almost from the first day his parents started going there. My sister did some of the best drugs of her life with kids who went to Christian High. Even I, who went to a small, Catholic college, knew that some of the best parties to go to were off-campus, where drunk men tell no tales. The best story involved a guess-the-penis contest. But I digress.
Oh yes, the U.S./Vatican disconnect. An inquisition of this type could only be carried out by the heads of state in Europe, and they have been down this road before. We have too, just with our own band of wingnuts. I doubt we will see any book-burning or witch burning here anytime soon, but I can't wait for the FOX Noise broadcast of "They Are Coming To Eat Your Children" Holiday Special, followed by the current War on Christmas telecast from everyone's favorite resident crazy, Bill-o. We can round this out with a Special Commentary by Keith, that will bitch-slap some sense into the straights just in time to save our collective asses from Pat Robertson.
They are good for something, at least. A great laugh.

"Under plans being considered, each bishop would have a group of priests in his diocese who were specially trained in exorcism and on hand to take action against "extreme Godlessness"."

I guess their first mission will be to exorcise the White House and the U.S. Congress.

So the Vatican actually has an "Exorcist in Chief" in their employ! Hee hee hee!

In a sea of unhappy news, thanks for the laughs this article provides.

You shouldn't try to pose analogies, mackgillicuddy, it's clearly not your forte. A better parallel would be between the Catholic heirarchy and the Bush administration: where those not directly involved in illegal, immoral or unseemly activities are at the very least hypocritical, dishonest or involved in a cover-up. I would concede the possibility that there are honorable people in both agencies, but they have all been tainted by their associations.

Hello Vatican, There's this evil occupying my White House...

I am a Catholic but these people don't represent my views in any way shape or form. Doesn't this sound like a return to the inquisition?? I think the Catholic church would better spend it's time finding out which of its priests are child molestors and turning them over to the law. That is a kind of exorcism I could support.

so that's what those priests were doing to those children.them children got demons and the priests were fighting them demons head-on..

Of all the organized religions there are good aspects and bad. I don't condemn catholics, because while I've met a lot of people who call themselves catholics, only a handful were outstandingly pious, and those few were really excellent people.

I don't believe in god, not because I think it is bad, or unintelligent, but because it never really worked for me. (I often attend churches, because I appreciate the community feeling created in them, the only long term service I have attended was at a michigan unitarian universalist fellowship, but they I hear are not uniform in their practices nationally) I usually put my "faith" in people, not that they will always do good by one another, but that it will balance out, and that people have good intentions.

there are some prejudices I have though, I admit to that, and try not to act on them, astrology, for example is something I am unfair toward, and I see that, and try not to be critical of people who believe it. I mean, I know there are stars and such, that is a tangible thing, so why I would feel justified in disrespecting that, when there is less evidence for me of a god..

Exorcism and all that stems from something that I personally cannot, and do not espouse. That people are born in sin. no way.
my most fundamental belief is probably that all people are born with inherent worth and dignity, and that there is no lesser person, from another. I think that evil and demons and all that is not the way I look at upsetting stuff. Murderers? probably chemically not-balanced, or products of the vicious cycle of violence (of which I think some organized religion plays a part) I don't think killing murderers makes sense for that reason.

Love the picture of Joey "the Rat" Ratzinger doing his Heil Hitler salute.

So now we are hunting down and smoking out the devil as well as all mortal evil-doers?

With a brainwashed pope in the Vatican, and a dumb-as-a-brick potus and a malevolent veep in the White House, it's no wonder the world is going to hell in a hand basket.

I turned 70 last week, so I only have another 20 years - give or take a few - to go.

I feel bad for my son, his generation and their kids. It's high time we all come to our senses and forget about imaginary devils and WsMD.

Instead, our religious and political leaders should concentrate on things important - too many babies, climate change, and working towards world peace come to mind. THAT is what most citizens want, for themselves and especially for their kids and all youngsters.

it makes me really sad that the only people I see looking at the world anything like I do are as old as some of you fine folks are.

they say the children are the future, but I think they've got it backwards. the future worth having is in the dreams of those closest to dying. Those who are aware of the beauty in life, and cherish it, protect it..but likewise are willing to give it selflessly in the hope, that wonderful hope, that the children will not squander it.

bless you who can be so beautiful, if blessings are real.
peace be unto you if that is possible,
and if life is such that it brings you joy, longevity for you and your efforts.

The Catholic church is about as far from being holy as one can get. Its leadership is truly corrupt and twisted (gee, sounds a lot like the Bushies). Any organization that tries to cover up pedophilia in its own ranks while promoting the conditions that allow pedophiles to join without any problem is definitely sick. I don't mean to belittle people who might be attached to the church that practice ethical behaviour but they'd probably be ethical regardless of what their religious affiliation was. The majority of Catholics are either lapsed, ignore half of the official teachings of the church or have other problems that they cover by feigning extreme piety. Religion isn't the guarantee of good behaviour, that depends on the individual. I don't know that I am an extreme atheist but I can certainly agree with Richard Dawkins when he warns of faith being used as a means of circumventing condemnation for negative actions. There are wonderful religious people and disgusting religious people, just as there are wonderful atheists and disgusting atheists. People are people.

reaction at reading this at 8:01....
Is this a joke? It is just hilarious. The picture of the Pope is spot on!

Upon finishing at 8:03...
The Exorcist in Chief would be a mighty fine title to put on letterhead addressed to your landlord. How can I join an organization with such histrionic titles? Sign me up, Father! Yes, Father!

Gotta get my local Catholic exorcist to compete against anyone else in the area who calls themselves an exorcist and maybe have a yearly contest where they practice their exorcisms against the local midwives. And get a panel of men to judge who does the best exorcism in town! (I kid the Catholic Church becuz I love it. C'mon)

You are right on the mark Samski

"The Vatican is concerned that young people are being exposed to Satanism through CORPORATIONS, THE CORPORATE MEDIA and the CORPORATE GOVERNMENT."

Caps are the corrections to make the original quote correct
____________

Does the Pope give the Nazi salute often ?